From My Couch

X-Men First Class

2011-11-19T12:04:00.001-08:00

I have not seen any of the other X-Men movies, except for the Wolverine movie, which I think is a little different anyway, so I think I come into this movie sort of like someone would come into Star Wars Phantom Menace without seeing A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi. I have no idea what the other movies are about.

I expected X-Men First Class to be like the wave of other super hero movies that have been in the theaters the past 5-10 years. And in many ways it is. Lots of computer-animated graphics. Lots of special sound effects. Unrealistic cinematic action. But this movie has something that the other movies didn't have - Kevin Bacon.

X-Men: First Class takes viewers back to World War II when the first mutants were discovered by evil Nazi scientists. Now they, the mutants, are older and various groups of mutants are discovering each other and banning together. Also in the mix are the bad mutants that are ready to take over the world.

Now set in the early 1960's with the Cuban Missile Crisis looming, the bad X-Men plan to use this to their advantage. Their weapons are deception, fear, and intimidation. Or were those the weapons of the Spanish Inquisition?

Also starring in this movie are James McAvoy as Dr. Charles Xavier, the chief of the good X-Men, Michael Fassbender as Magneto, January Jones as Emma Frost, Zoë Kravitz as Angel Salvadore, and Oliver Platt as "Man in Black Suit". I could list another dozen more of the actors playing super heroes. But I'm not going to.

There was one glaring flaw in the battle scene with the computer animated graphics. Any Navy man would probably notice it. Other keen or trained eyes may catch it, too.

X-Men: First Class is Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of violence, language, some sexuality, an some partial nudity. Apparently naked aliens counts as nudity now. Maybe only if she has breasts. Blue ones.

Overall, I was impressed with X-Men: First Class. I didn't expect much from the movie, but it was actually not that bad. So if you like or can tolerate science fiction movies, I think you'll like this movie. I give X-Men: First Class 3.6 stars.

Hanna

2011-11-15T19:04:00.000-08:00

Hanna is a film about a young girl named Hanna (Saoirse Ronan - who I think makes a great young Cate Blanchett) who has been raised in solitude, but trained for combat and self-defense. But why? Her father, Erik Heller (Eric Bana), has been training her his whole life to be a multilingual fighter. But why? What Hanna does not know is that Erik has a secret and the CIA, and more importantly, agent Marissa Wiegle (Cate Blanchett) wants him and Hanna dead.

When Hanna is ready to face the world, she flips a switch indicating to the CIA of Erik's presence. Hanna is soon captured, but not for long. The CIA and Marissa learn that Hanna is fully trained and will be difficult to stop.

The rest of the movie depicts Marissa chasing Hanna and Hanna beating up people, while befriending a family on a vacation in the desert Southwest.

I think I got sort of lost with the movie. I understand why Hanna was running, but what was she running to, other than to kill Marissa before she kills her? I understand the secret, so I guess exposing the secret will destroy Marissa's career, so is that basically it? Is this movie too cerebra for me?

I'll admit that the action was pretty cool and persistent, though the plot was a bit too science fiction to be believable.

Hanna is Rated R for violence, a bit of language, and some sexual situations. The movie was directed by Joe Wright, who also directed Atonement (another Saoirse Ronan movie), and Pride and Prejudice (of the most recent remake). He's currently working on Anna Karenina, which I think will be 200 hours long.

Also starring in the movie are Jessica Barden as Hanna friend, Tom Hollander, Olivia Williams, and Jason Flemying, mostly actors I do not know.

Overall, I thought that the movie was decent. I just wish that I wasn't so confused at the end. Sometimes I just need someone to explain things to me at the end. I give Hanna and her blond eyebrows 3.4 stars.

The Quiet Man

2011-11-12T08:00:00.000-08:00

I've never been a big fan of John Wayne. I think that's mostly because he did westerns and I don't really care for westerns. However, he did make a few movies where he didn't wear a cowboy hat. The Quiet Man was one of them.

Many actors have a counterpart of the opposite sex that often play opposite them in many movies. There's Bogey and Bacall, Tracey and Hepburn, Judy Garland and Mickey Rooney. John Wayne's Katharine Hepburn is Maureen O'Hara. Her most popular movie was probably Miracle on 34th Street. Other big titles were Alfred Hitchcock's Jamaica Inn, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, How Green Was My Valley, and the original The Parent Trap.

In The Quiet Man, Wayne is an Irishman, Sean Thornton, returning to Ireland after living most of his life in America, to reclaim his family's property. Neighboring property owner Red Danaher (Victor McLaglen) wants the property, but Sean outbids him. Meanwhile, Sean falls in love with Red's sister Mary Kate (O'Hara), but Red refuses to allow him to marry her.

Sean, a former boxer, eventually wins approval, but as Sean is unaccustomed to the pride of the Irish and their customs, he has a difficult time appreciating what is important to others, which strains his marriage. He eventually loses respect from many, in addition to losing Mary Kate, and must fight to win her and everyone's respect back.

The best line of the movie is when someone asks Sean Thorton where he lived in America. He said he lived in Pittsburgh, if you can call that living. Hysterical!

The movie was filmed in color, but not by a high quality color film, so by today's standards it looks pretty bad. I initially thought it was a colorized black and white movie. The movie was mostly filmed in Ireland, home to many of the actors, including supporting actor Barry Fitzgerald.

The Quiet Man is 2 hours and ten minutes long. The movie was made in 1952 and directed by the famous John Ford, often considered the best director of all time. In fact, he won an Oscar for Best Director in The Quiet Man. The movie also won an Academy Award for Best Cinemotography. It was also nominated for Best Picture, Best Supporting Actor (Victor McLaglen), Best Art Direction, Best Sound, and Best Adapted Screenplay.

I found the movie to be a bit long and without a clear direction. As acclaimed as the movie was, I only thought it to be moderately good. I did, however, enjoy the culturally appropriate music. And I always enjoy Barry Fitzgerald, especially when he's been a wee bit to the bottle.

I give The Quiet Man an even 3 stars.

The Adjustment Bureau

2011-11-11T11:11:00.000-08:00

When I speak of William Holden being the lead man of his era, I can say that Matt Damon is the lead man of his era. At only 41 years old, Damon continues to put out movies year after year that capture your imagination or your attention, regardless of its material. And he can also successfully slide over to television (Liz Lemon's boyfriend on 30 Rock).

The Adjustment Bureau is Damon's newest movie to be released on DVD (remember I rarely go to the movie theater. Too expensive and people just won't shut the funk up!)

In this movie, Damon is a young Congressman David Norris running for the U.S. Senate. While reflecting upon the day and mentally preparing for his speech, Norris runs into a young lady named Elise (Emily Blunt) and instantly falls in love. Norris' speach is considered a dramatic success, though he loses the election after some frivilous behavior is exposed.

All the while, the audience watches as these men in hats seem to be following him around. Several years later, Harry (Anthony Mackie), one of these hatted men, is instructed to make Norris spill his coffee so that he misses the bus. Harry falls asleep, Norris makes the bus and again runs into Elise. Then he runs into men in his office that seem to be lobotomizing his coworkers. After an unsuccessful flight attempt, Norris is detained and told that the hatted men are from the Adjustment Bureau, men instructed to keep certain people's fate in line. Norris, not wanting to be tied to a predetermined fate which he disagrees with, spends the rest of the movie trying to outrun and mislead the hatted men.

The Adjustment Bureau is based on the romantic science fiction thriller book The Adjustment Team by Philip K. Dick. This movie was captivating to me. I only intended on watching half of it one night and the other half the following night. Instead I found myself watching it through to 11:30pm, which is late for me. I suffered for it the next day at work.

In addition to Damon and Blunt, the movie also stars John Slattery from Mad Men, Anthony Ruivivar, who you may recognize from Third Watch, Michael Kelly, an absolute knock-off for Elliot "Spitz or Swallows" Spitzer, the disgraced former governor of New York. Oh, and left-wing liberal fake news comedian John Stewart's in it, too.

The Adjustment Bureau is an hour and 40 minutes long and Rated R for some strong language, violence, and some minor sexuality.

I really enjoyed The Adjustment Bureau and I think you will, too. You do not have to be a science fiction fan to appreciate this movie. There's romance, action, drama....something for everyone. I'll give The Adjustment Bureau 4.2 stars. Check it out.

The Gallant Hours

2011-11-11T10:12:00.000-08:00

I love watching war movies. Mostly movies from World War II. I wish there were more movies about the American Revolution and the Civil War, but there are not. From a cinematic perspective, it's good that World War II occurred when it did because film photography was finally advanced enough to get great footage of the actual war, and to recreate many of the battles that had occurred only months or years prior.

The Gallant Hours is a World War II movie about Admiral "Bull" Halsey. I think the most significant observation of this movie is that James Cagney looks remarkably similar to the actual person he portrayed in the movie. I wonder if the two men ever met. (I just looked it up and they did meet on the set of the movie!)

The movie starts off with Halsey getting ready to retire from the Navy, then goes into a reflection of his years as an Admiral in the Pacific Fleet. The film highlights a critical era in the War in the Pacific as the United States tries to stave off the Japanese in the Philippines.

Counter to the story of Admiral Halsey is the story of Japanese Admiral Yamamoto. What I found interesting is that the dialog in those scenes was in Japanese with no subtitles. The movie is narrated by Robert Montgomery (close friend of Cagney and father of Samantha from Bewitched, Elizabeth Montgomery). During the Japanese dialog, Montgomery only provides what I assume to be cursory narration.

The Gallant Hours, which was made in 1960, is just under 2 hours long. It was made in black and white. Also starring in the movie are Dennis Weaver (McCloud and Gunsmoke), Les Tremayne, Richard Burton, and Raymond Bailey, whom you may remember as Mr. Drysdale from the Beverly Hillbillies.

The Gallant Hours is a great World War II-era movie, though the film depicts no battle scenes. I read that the movie was very accurate except for a few minor details. Cagney and The Gallant Hours were good enough for me to give them the coveted 5 stars. This is a great movie to watch for Veteran's Day!

Union Station

2011-11-10T13:08:00.000-08:00

William Holden is one of my favorite actors of all time. I really didn't know anything about him until I was watching an old rerun of Magnum P.I. and Thomas Magnum said that William Holden was one of his favorite actors and his favorite movie was Stalag 17. I then got Stalag 17 from the library and loved it. I then got other Holden movies such as Sunset Boulevard and Sabrina and decided that Thomas Magnum was right - this guy is a great actor. Since then I've seen about 20 or more of his movies. And this is one of them.

In this classic crime drama, Union Station starts with a train ride where a young lady (Nancy Olson, who also starred in Sunset Boulevard) notices two suspicious characters getting on the train that she is riding, then notices one of them has a gun. She reports the issue to one of the conductors, but gets little empathy. Begrudgingly, the issue is reported and Lt. William Calhoun of the train police is brought in to investigate. Once the police get hot on the trail, they realize that another young lady may have been kidnapped and it becomes a cat and mouse chase.

Made in 1950, Union Station is a classic film noir. These are the types of movies your parents grew up on. I'm acting more like my parent's age than my own - I really liked this movie.

The movie also stars the famous Irish character actor Barry Fitzgerald as Inspector Donnelly, whom you may recognize from The Quiet Man and Going My Way. Others include Jan Sterling and Parley Baer, probably best known as the voice of Ernie Keebler of the cookie world.

Union Station has a decent plot, though there are no dramatic plot twists or spans of anxious tension (by today's standards). However, for being a classic crima drama, Union Station fills that niche and fills it well. Holden, as always, is strong, yet romantic.

I give Union Station 4.4 stars.

Casbah

2011-11-06T18:01:00.000-08:00

Since we dropped the Netflix plan that delivers movies to your home, I have been watching a lot of older movies, since that is mostly what Netflix offers as movies.

This past week I watched a movie that I put in my queue that has Peter Lorre, whom you would recognize from Bugs Bunny cartoons if you didn't know him as the actor himself. The movie also has Yvonne DeCarlo in it, whom you will remember as Lillith from The Munsters. I have never considered her to be an attractive actress. After all, she was married to Herman Munster and she was more of mistress of the dark. However, in Casbah, as a young woman and not in her goulish costume - she's actually very beautiful.

The movie plot is simple. Algiers is full of thieves and Pepe Le Moko (actor\singer Tony Martin) decides to hide amongst the other thieves. While hiding out he falls in love with French tourist named Gaby (Swedish actress Märta Torén). When his ex-lover Inez (Yvonne DeCarlo) learns of his desire, she decides to work with police to help get him captured. Now Pepe must decide whether to hide or try to flee with his new French love.

Casbah was made in 1948 and directed by John Berry, one of the directors blacklisted during McCarthism for being named as a Communist. The movie was 93 minutes long and won an Academy Award for Best Original Song.

Also starring in the movie are Austrian Hugo Hoss and Thomas Gomez, who won an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor for his performance in Ride the Pink Horse.

Too old to be rated, but certainly tame enough for a PG rating, I only found Cashab moderately entertaining. As I mentioned I enjoyed looking at a young Yvonne DeCarlo, but the movie is considered a musical, though I don't think there are really that many songs. As far as older movies goes, I'll give this an average 3 stars.

Does this woman look like Lillith Munster????

Best Laid Plans

2011-11-05T16:07:00.001-07:00

Remember my mission to see all of Reese's movies? Well, here's another one I just saw.

When former college friend Bryce (Josh Brolin) shows up, he's treated to an evening of drinking with his old college buddy Nick (Alessandro Nivola), and some sexy romance with a girl he meets (Reese Witherspoon). However, after he wakes up and doesn't remember the evening, things start going horribly wrong. The movie then unfolds into an intricate web of deception, conspiracy, and double-crossing. Will Nick be able to help Bryce get out of this mess? Any more information than this may spoil the plot.

Best Laid Plans is Rated R for violence, adult themes, nudity (not Reese), language, and drug abuse. This psychological thriller from 1999 was directed by Mike Barker, who's best known for American Dad, and is a whopping 93 minutes long.

Best Laid Plans had a lot of potential. The plot is really not that bad - up until the end. When I got to the end, I was so disappointed that I was mad at the movie. "Are you kidding me?" I shouted. I understand that it is difficult to create a plot-twisting dramatic ending, but this ending seems like it was written by a high school drama team 10 minutes before class. 'Hey, we wrote this great movie, but the story is due at 11:30. How should we end it?'

As I stated before, if you like ole Reese, then you would certainly tolerate, if not enjoy, this movie right up until the end. But you can certainly do better than this movie. I give Best Plaid Plans 2.5 stars. Boooooooo.....

Fear

2011-11-04T20:48:00.000-07:00

I may have mentioned before that one of my objectives is to watch all of Reese Witherspoon's movies. When I came to the realization that I liked her and looked her library of movies, there really aren't that many big hits. Sweat Home Alabama and Walk the Line come to mind. Both are a couple of my all-time favorite movies.

So thus began my mission to watch all of her movies. I've now seen her ealiest movies that she made as a child (The Man in the Moon (actually, this one was pretty good), Wildflower, Twilight (which I think is the only movie in which she gets naked), and Pleasantville).

This week I watched Fear. In Fear she plays a high school girl (she's actually 20 years old when she plays this role). She's a bit of a party girl and when her parent's decide to leave her home for the weekend, she uses the opportunity to bring home a boy. Little does she know that this boy, Dave (Mark Wahlberg) is a raging lunatic. But as any guy who's been to high school can tell you, the pretty girls always go for the crazy, mean, and stupid guys. What's the attraction???

Eventually, David moves into the family relationship and Nicole's father Steven (William Paterson) starts to question this guy. He's seems awfully chummy with his wife Laura (Amy Brenneman). Nicole starts to realize that David is not who she thinks he is when she sees him with her friend Margo (Alyssa Milano - remember when she was cute? Now she's just kind of weird).

When the family decides that it's time for David to go, David does not go quietly.

Fear is rated R for violence, sexuality, language and unemotional acting. The movie is 96 minutes long.

I say unemotional, because when your life is on the line, or you think something terrible is going to happen, your reaction isn't going to be, "Hmmm....what do we do?" It's going to be a blood-curdling scream. And it's not like the people in the movie were able to contain their emotion. They just lacked it.

The movie's only redeeming quality was the roller coaster scene. You could probably lift that off of the Internet. You'll never think of a roller coaster the same way. And did I mention that she's in a bikini in several scenes???

I did accomplish one objective - I watched another Reese Witherspoon movie. What I did not accomplish was watching a good movie. I can only give Fear 2.3 stars. It really isn't worth watching this movie unless you're a big Witherspoon fan.

Your Highness

2011-11-02T17:15:00.000-07:00

If you like filth, foul language, inappropriate and pervasive sexual, masturbatorial, and homo-erotica dialog, you will LOVE this movie. If you don't like those kinds of things, then run away and lock yourself in a room with The Sound of Music. Julie Andrews is your friend.

Your Highness is a middle ages comedy about a young Princess Belladonna (Zooey Deschanel - who's making her rounds on gossip news, of which I could care less) who is kidnapped prior to her wedding to the young brave and worthy Prince Fabious (James Franco). His not-so-worthy overweight and unambitious brother Thadeos (Danny McBride) begrudgingly agrees to go on a mission to rescue his bride and return to the castle.

The two brothers then cross the land and seek knowledge from perverted puppets demanding sexual favors, get attacked by naked women threatening to kill them, and cross paths with the lovely and worthy warrioress, Isabell (Natalie Portman).

This movie is zany. This movie is gross. This movie is hysterical if you can tolerate it.

Directed by David Gordon Green, Your Highness is Rated R, but the unrated version would definitely be XXX. There's language, nudity, pervasive sexual references and innuendo, language, violence, and language.

The movie also stars Charles Dance as King Tallious, which I think is a reference to a penis (tally-whacker), Toby Jones as Julie the peasant helper, and Justin Therox as Leezer.

I'm not real sure how to rate this movie. With most of my friends, this movie would not warrant a discussion. In fact, it may tarnish my reputation to admit that I found parts of it funny. I might be labeled and banned for running for a political office. But to my perverted sexually-twisted friends, they'll like this movie. I'll give it an even-keeled 3 stars.

Win Win

2011-10-30T07:05:00.000-07:00

When one thinks of Paul Giamatti, one instantly thinks of John Adams, the wildly successful mini-series on HBO, based on the book by David McCullough. Giamatti doesn't just look like John Adams, he IS John Adams.

Fast forward 200 years, John Adams stars in this comedy drama about a lawyer in New Jersey who's lawyerly life is not living up to what he had hoped it to be for him and his wife Jackie (Amy Ryan). He finds himself taking somewhat advantage of an older gentleman named Leo (Burt Young - Adrian's brother from Rocky) by becoming his guardian, then dumping him off in an assisted living facility and collecting the monthly cash. Then out of nowhere, Leo's grandson shows up to live with Leo.

Having nowhere to go for a few days until things can get settled, John Adams takes in Leo's teenage grandson Kyle (Alex Shaffer), a child of few words. Trying to keep him busy, President Adams offers to take him to his moonlighting job, a high school where he is the wrestling coach. Kyle asks to wrestle with the team and the other coaches, Vigman (Jeffrey Tambor 0f Arrested Development), and Terry (Bobby Cannavale) realize they have a wrestling progeny on their hands.

But just as things are starting to look up for this wayward child, his drug-addicted and abusive mother Cindy (Melanie Lynskey) shows up to take him back with her to Ohio, and Kyle has no intentions of going back.

Directed by Thomas McCarthy, Win Win is rated R for language, and there really wasn't that much of it. And it wasn't used in vain like most movies. The movie is an hour and 40 minutes long.

I liked Win Win. My wife watched this one with me, which is a novelty in itself. She said it was just okay and that the story line was a little slow. I'll give her that. But Win Win is one of those movies that gives you hope that good things can happen. And though not ragingly funny, the movie does have its moments.

I'll give Win Win 3.9 stars.

Unfaithfully Yours

2011-10-29T11:35:00.000-07:00

I haven't reviewed an old black and white movie lately. So here you go. A relatively obscure one. Most people have heard of Casablanca and Gone With the Wind, but what about Unfaithfully Yours?

Unfaithfully Yours stars Rex Harrison as Sir Alfred De Carter, a world famous symphony conductor. After he returns from a stint in England, Sir Alfred learns that his brother-in-law August (Rudy Valee), whom has had asked to keep an eye on his wife Daphne (Linda Darnell), (and you thought the only Daphne was from Scooby-Doo), hired an investigator to follow her rather than to 'just keep an eye on her'. However, the private investigator has revealed that Mrs. Daphne has been spending much time with Sir Alfred's personal Secretary Anthony Windborn (Kurt Kreuger). Now Sir Alfred suspects his wife's infidelity.

Throughout the remainder of the movie, Sir Alfred envisions ways to commit the perfect crime - the murder of his wife for her transgressions. His fantasizes about this treachery during his conduction of his symphony's, which drive his wild ambition, which have the effect of much aggrandized performances which mesmerizes his audiences.

Now Sir Alfred must act out his fantasy and do the deed. But will he have the courage?

Unfaithfully Yours was made in 1948, and thus was not rated by the secret society known as the MPAA. The movie has some implied violence and some subtle sexual references, harmless by today's standards.

I really enjoyed this movie and at times could not discern fact from fiction. Rex Harrison becomes the mad infatuated conductor and pulls off his role with absolute brilliance.

I read a bit about the actors in the movie and found their real lives to be just as interesting, if not more, than the actual movie. Linda Darnell, who was a very beautiful woman, fell into alcoholism and depression. She had numerous affairs and marriages, including an affair with Mickey Rooney, and was extorted and threatened. She ended up dying at the age 41 in a house fire.

Rex Harrison, on the other hand, had 6 wives, 2 of whom committed suicide, and 1 died of leukemia.

I really like old "talkies" as my wife calls them. This one was no different. I'll give Unfaithfully Yours 4.1 stars.

Paul

2011-10-29T11:01:00.000-07:00

The movie Paul is a culmination of science fiction, referencing popular movies, comics, books, nerd conventions, Area 51, and all other such nerdome, as experienced by British travelers Graeme Willy (Simon Pegg) and Clive Gollings (Nick Frost).

After attending the San Diego Comic Con, Graeme and Clive rent an RV (recreational vehicle for all you city-folk) and map out a course of extraterrestrial legends across the desert-Southwest of the United States that they plan to visit. As you would expect anywhere outside of New York City, Boston, and Los Angeles, America is inhabited by lunatic right-wing religious nuts carrying guns, wearing camouflage, and spitting on the floor. Clive and Graeme run into such characters and thus begin their flee from the law.

However, in this dramatic flight, they nearly literally run into Paul, an alien (Seth Rogen), with quite an attitute (like Seth Rogen) and a propensity for some of the finer vices of society, (like Seth Rogen).

What they didn't know is that Paul is also being pursued by Special Agent Lorenzo Zoil (Jason Bateman), Agent Haggard (Bill Hader), and Agent O'Reilly (Joe Lo Trulgio) under the direction of "The Big Guy" (Sigourney Weaver).

Along the way, the Brits run into one-eyed redneck Jesus girl named Ruth (Kristen Wiig) and her father Moses Buggs (John Carroll Lynch), of which Graeme strikes up a love interest (with Ruth, not her father).

All tensions culminate at the end with some good ole' fashion violence. The movie is strung together with some hysterical reference to science fiction pop culture (such as Star Wars). Check out the music being played in the country bar! Or the Han Solo reference, which is more subtle.

There are cameo appearances by Jeffrey Tambor, Bateman's castmate on the hysterically funny show Arrested Development, and the occasionally funny David Koechner.

Paul is Rated R for language, violence, drug use, sexual reference, and at times an inappropriate attack on religion, though interestingly, none of the other reviews mentioned that. But then again the other reviews probably came from liberal atheists out of New York and Los Angeles. The movie is about an hour and 45 minutes long.

I thought Paul was very funny at times, but dragged along at others. I agree with some reviews that the movie had a lot of potential and left it on the drawing board. Paul could have been absolutely hysterical, but unfortunately achieves only moderately funny.

I'll beam down 3.4 stars.

The Eagle

2011-10-19T20:43:00.000-07:00

The Eagle is a historical fiction about the disappearance of the 9th Legion of the Roman army. Historically true is that the legion advanced north of the Hadriatic wall in Britian, never to be seen again. The Eagle was an important symbol of the time and the legions would defend it to the end.

Despite his father being given up for dead, young Marcus Flavius Aquila (Channing Tatum) requests to post in Britian near where his father would have been. Young Aquila proves himself a valuable warrior and eventually requests a mission to cross the wall and recover The Eagle, despite not knowing its whereabouts. He has the support of his uncle (Donald Sutherland) and is given a slave a British slave named Esca (Jamie Bell) to accompany him.

They set out for the north of Britian, an area now known as the Scottish Highlands and run into a rabble of people, where they fight and show their gallantry in hope of finding The Eagle. Does it still exist? If they do find it, can they actually return it to Rome?

The Eagle is Rated PG-13 for violence and some borish British acting and is just under 2 hours long.

Also staring in the movie are Mark Strong, Tahar Rahim, and Denis O'Hare - all extremely famous actors from the Highlands.

I kept my expectations for this movie low as I've seen some of Channing's other movies (Public Enemies, G.I. Joe, and The Dilemna). However, I actually enjoyed this movie. The storyline was interesting and with it spurred my interest in reading about the actual 9th Legion, some part of history that I was unaware.

Despite the lack of credible actors, I can give The Eagle 3.8 stars.

Real Steel

2011-10-19T13:54:00.000-07:00

My wife won tickets to the see this movie, but actually had no interest in seeing in, so she offered the tickets to me and I took my good friend Duckman and we hauled off to White Marsh to see it. We got there a few minutes before it started, but much to our chagrin the only seats left were the ones right at the front where you have to stare straight up to see it. Ugh...

In the future, society has shunned the brutality of humans boxing each other, and instead shifted to boxing robots. Charlie Kenton (Hugh Jackman) is one of the premier boxing robot operators in the world, but certainly not the best. He has a brief encounter with world fame, but quickly falters and begins to wonder if the end of this career path is nearing.

Charlie eventually encounters eleven year old Max (Dakota Goyo) who latches on to him and Charlie humors him by helping him rebuild a relic shadow boxer named Atom and agrees to take him to matches.

Max quickly learns that he does not pocess the skills to operate Atom, but Charlie does. Thus begins their adventure to climb to the top of the boxing world.

So how did I like this movie? This movie was about as predictable as the alphabet. Several times I whispered to my friend what was going to happen next, and low and behold, it happened. He then predicted another scene. One of my Facebook friends, without even seeing the movie, summarized it by saying it is Transformers meets Rocky. Let me tell you, that's not too far from the truth.

Also staring in the movie are Evangeline Lilly, best known for Lost, Kevin Durand, Hope Davis, and James Rebhorn, who you'll remember as the headmaster in Scent of a Woman, and other such movies.

Real Steel is 127 minutes long and Rated PG-13 for violence, language, intense action, and severe predictability.

The movie was moderately average, and have I mentioned predictable? I'll give this movie 2.5 stars. Not bad for a free movie.

Henry's Crime

2011-09-10T06:00:00.000-07:00

If you've done the time, do the crime. That's the motto of Henry's Crime. Henry (Keanu Reeves) is convicted of assisting in a bank robbery and does several years in prison in beautifully scenic Buffalo, New York. He didn't do it, but wouldn't turn in his friends that did the crime. And his wife leaves him. Great.

While in prison Henry befriends Max Saltsman (James Caaaaan) and older prisoner that takes him under his wings. While doing his time, Henry and Max learn of each other's crimes. Max is comfortable is prison. It's his home. He's fed. He sleeps. They tell him what to do. It's easy. But Henry's ready to leave. But one thought sticks with him after he hears it while in line getting a haircut: "if you've done the time, do the crime".

After leaving prison, Henry runs into Julie Ivanova (Vera Fermiga), an actress in a play at a theater that sits next to the bank. Perhaps she's a asset to commit his crime, and perhaps they really fall in love. And perhaps this is a bogus adventure.

This movie moved really slow. Bill and Ted are convincingly not very intelligent. Shane Falco suffers from lack of compelling dialog. Why Julie would even let Neo into her life is beyond me. I like James Caaaaaaan. His character is believable and very interesting, as always. Farmiga is okay. I certainly wouldn't expect any Hollywood awards for this film.

Henry's Crime was directed by Malcolm Venville, who's also known for the compelling and heart warming movie 44 Inch Chest. Also starring in the movie are Judy Greer and his pretty, but shallow wife, Fisher Stevens as a former friend and criminal, Peter Stomare as the director, and Bill Duke as the security group.

Henry's Crime is rated R for language and some sexual situations. The language seemed to be randomly placed, giving the impression that it was added with the intention of grabbing that R rating. Remove a few F-bombs and two scenes of moving bed sheets and this movie is easily rated PG-13.

I found myself watching the timer on the DVD player hoping it would almost be over. As much as I have been hoping for 20 years that Keanu Reeve's movie career is on the cusp of turning around, this movie isn't it. I give Henry's Crime 2.4 stars.

Boogie Woogie

2011-08-18T19:09:00.000-07:00

When I first saw that Heather Graham was in this movie, I thought to myself, 'this is the second movie she's starred in with the word "boogie" (Boogie Nights was the other). It has nothing to do with nasal drippings. It has to do with dancing and art.

Boogie Woogie is considered a cerebral drama, based in London. Heather Graham plays the role of Beth Freemantle, the assistant and rising star at an art gallery. She works for Art Spindle (Danny Huston), the arrogant and manipulative studio owner. But more importantly, Amanda Seyfried is in the movie starring as a hired assistant named Paige Oppenheimer. Also important to the movie is Alan Cumming as Dewey Dalamanatousis, the flamboyant artist who wants to get his art displayed.

The film tracks these different members of different classes of society. The money rules, and those struggling want some of that money.

The plot of this movie is fairly thin. However, the characters are awesome. Dewey is that weenie of a guy that you really can't stand, but yet harbour sympathy for the fight against the way he is treated. Danny Huston is at the top of his game. He is such an absolute ass and he has an intolerable, yet catching laugh. "ha-ha. HA_HA!!" I find myself repeating it often. It's so phony, but so awesome.

And of course we have both the lovely Amanda Seifried and Heather Graham. The movie also stars Gillian Anderson, Stellen Skarsgard, Jack Huston, and Charlotte Rampling, whom you may remember being totally nude in The Swimming Pool.

Boogie Woogie is Rated R for strong sexual content, graphic nudity (genitals), language, and drug use. Boogie Woogie is 94 minutes long. Fairly short for a non-romantic comedy.

By the way, Boogie Woogie is the name of the famous painting in the movie that they were pursuing. It was owned by Mr Alfred Rhinegold (Christopher Lee), an impoverished gentleman who is being pushed to sell the valuable painting.

Overall, the movie was okay. Like I said, the plot is thin, but the characters are excellent. I would watch this movie again, but need to give it some time. Ha-ha. HA-HA!!! I give it 3.3 stars.

Hall Pass

2011-08-13T15:02:00.000-07:00

Hall Pass is a movie that most middle-aged men can relate to. And don't use prepositions to end sentences with.

Rick (Owen Wilson) and Fred (Jason Sudeikis) are two middle aged men who are unhappy with their sex lives. Their wives, Grace (Christina Applegate) and Maggie (Jenna Fischer) get tired of catching them looking at other women and surfing porn. They talk with their friend Dr. Lucy (Joy Behar, who I swear her real name is Joy Blowhard) and Dr. Lucy suggests giving their husbands hall passes. This is a pass to do whatever they want for one week and it will save their marriage. This pass includes flirting with women, kissing women, and having sex with other women. In this age of sexually transmitted diseases, this seems to be a big turnoff to me, but if you can be shallow and just look at the intent without the consequences, this could be interesting.

The wives skip town with their kids and the boys are left at home to do as they please. However, they soon realize that they are not 20 anymore. Picking up girls isn't that easy when you're in your 40's. The movie is pretty funny throughout much of the first half. Seeing the guys drinking at the bar that turns out to be Applebee's cracked me up!

The movie has a nice twist when the women put their guard down and start meeting men. At this point I figured out the rest of the movie.

Hall Pass is definitely funnier in the first half compared to the second half. It lacks direction past the first hour and seems to be mostly filler until they can come to a conclusion.

The movie has cameos by former Who's the Boss starlet Alyssa Milano and former Red Sox and Baltimore Orioles player Dwight Evans, in addition to comedian Bo Burnham, and J.B. Smoove.

Hall Pass is directed by the Farrelly brothers, Peter and Bobby. You'll recognize their other romantic comedies and regular comedies, such as Dumb and Dumber, Something About Mary, Me, Myself, and Irene, Shallow Hal, and Fever Pitch.

Hall Pass is Rated R and is 105 minutes long. For those of you who attended Baltimore City public schools this is an hour and 45 minutes. The R-Rating is for some language and nudity, but the straight guys will be disappointed as it was penises. For you gay guys, you'll be super excited!

I did get a few good laughs in this movie, so despite that they came in the first 55 minutes, I'll give Hall Pass 3 stars.

Kill the Irishman

2011-06-21T18:00:00.000-07:00

Based on a really interesting true story, Kill the Irishman stars Ray Stevenson as Danny Greene, an Irishman who rises to power in the mafia in Cleveland. The movie opens being set in the 1960's on the Cleveland waterfront. Tired of being bullied and overworked, Danny takes the necessary steps to help his union. This eventually leads him to bigger and better things, until eventually he's basically running the Cleveland mafia

Danny Greene's fate is obvious, and it's his murder and investigation that helped the Justice Department bring down the notorious mobster families in New York. Those cases were tried by future New York City Mayor Rudy Guiliani.

In addition to Ray Stevenson, the movie stars Vincent D'Onofrio as Greene's closest ally. You'll remember D'Onofrio from his younger days when he played Private Pyle in Full Metal Jacket. Also starring in the moving is Christopher Walken as on of the mob connections in Cleveland who helps run money from New York, Val Kilmer as the Cleveland detective, Linda Cardellini as his first wife (remember her from Freaks and Geeks?), Tony Darrow, a real-life mobster who also starred in The Sopranos, Paul Sorvino, from Law and Order and he played a mobster in Goodfellas, and finally Laura Ramsey, the very attractive girlfriend of Danny Greene.

The movie was directed by Jonathan Hensleigh, but I read a review of the movie in the Cleveland Plain Dealer that humorously said 'had Danny Greene lived and operated in New York, he would have been a higher profile gangster and the movie would ultimately have been directed by Martin Scorsese and starred Robert de Niro.

Kill the Irishman is Rated R for strong violence (shootings and car bombs), language, and nudity (Laura Ramsey...gggrrrrr)

I really liked this movie. I'd have to say this is one of the better movies that I've seen this year. Had I realized that this movie was based on a true story prior to watching it, I probably would have enjoyed it even more. As it was, once the movie finished and those closing comments came on the screen, I thought, "Oh, crap! I didn't know that!"

Given what I know now and how much I liked this movie while watching it without the historical benefit, I give Kill the Irishman 4.5 stars.

Love and Other Drugs

2011-05-30T12:05:00.001-07:00

You may say that this is just another romantic drama with Anne Hathaway batting her big brown eyes at the camera and putting every male with a sex-drive into a sinful trance. Well, you'd be partially correct. However, in this romantic drama, we get to see a lot of her personal real estate, so to speak.

Love and Other Drugs, a movie based on the non-fiction book Hard Sell: The Evolution of a Viagra Salesman, stars Anne Hathaway as Maggie Murdock, a Parkinson's patient. She crosses paths with drug salesman Jamie Reidy (Jake Gyllenhaal). Mr. Reidy is a bit of an underachiever in his family, but an aggressive overachieving drug salesman shark.

After their initial encounter, Jamie pursues Maggie, despite her outrage at his behavior and abuse of his position. However, they eventually come to like each other, despite her long-term prognosis and expected fate. Jamie, however, meets someone at a convention for people with Parkinson's who is a spouse of a patient, who gave him the advise to run and leave her now. Now Jamie begins to have doubts about their relationship.

Despite the grim circumstances of the movie, Jamie and Maggie have quite an interesting relationship. And their relationship is graphically depicted with lots of nudity. Who knew that Anne Hathaway like to be so naked? Full backal-nudity. (is that a word? Is it the opposite of full-frontal nudity???). I'd say only about 5% of her was not shown on camera in this movie. And I'm not ashamed to say it was fantastic.

For the ladies, or the guys who enjoyed Broke Back Mountain, Jamie shows a bit of butt.

Directed by renowned director Edward Zwick (Glory, Legends of the Fall, Courage Under Fire, The Last Samurai, and Blood Diamond), Love and Other Drugs is Rated R for nudity, strong sexual situations, nudity, language, nudity, drug use, and nudity.

Also staring in Love and Other Drugs was Oliver Platt, Hank Azaria, and some others I don't know.

Overall, this movie is just average, perhaps about a 3.3 on a 5 scale. But if you're looking for "cinematography", this one is a solid 4.3.

Gulliver's Travels

2011-05-26T08:36:00.001-07:00

Here's a movie that I got formy kids. If Jack Black is in it, you know it's goofy and most likely a kid-friendly movie.

The movie sort of follows the book of the same name, but with a modern spin and a lot of the added antics that you would expect from Jack Black.

As you may know, Gulliver travels by sea, but gets hit by a storm and ends up on the island of Lilliput. Lilliput is full of little people, just like in Ireland, but these people are called Lilliputians. They initially fear Gulliver because of his ginormous size, but he helps to save them at one point and earns their respect - the respect of everyone except for the Princess' fiance that is. Gulliver then abuses his new-found fame, and to his chagrin, the Princess' fiance exposes him. Now he must fight to regain their trust. And it could happen when the Princess' fiance goes rogue.

Gulliver's Travels is full of quasi-famous actors, including Jason Segal, one of the original Freaks and Geeks, Emily Blunt as the Princess, the always lovely Amanda Peet, Gulliver's long-time crush, and Billy Connolly as the King (remember him from Head of the Class? He replaced (succeeded?) Howard Hessman).

Gulliver's Travels was produced by Rob Letterman, not sure if he's related to David Letterman. Letterman, the former, also produced the mildly entertaining Monsters vs. Aliens, which is not to be confused with Alien vs. Predator. The latter is a midly entertaining aging talk show host.

The movie is rated PG for some crude humor, a naked butt (nope, not Amanda Peete's nor Emily Blunts - sorry!), and some mild language.

If I had watched this movie on my own, I would not have liked it too much. But watching it with my kids and hearing them laugh made me laugh. Therefore, it was worth it. I'll give this an even 3 stars. It met the expectations of the intended audience.

Fair Game

2011-04-12T14:30:00.000-07:00

Fair game is the movie based on the true story of Valerie Plame and her exposure as a CIA operative when her husband Joe Wilson admonishes the Bush Administration for going to war in Iraq under false pretenses. Ambassador Joe Wilson is played by Sean Penn. I swear I watched the entire movie thinking, "Is that Sean Penn?" If he only would have said, "Whoa, Mr. Hand!", then I would have known who it was. Valerie Plame is portrayed by Naomi Watts. The story is well-known, especially if you haven't been living under a rock for the past 10 years. Plame is doing undercover work and communicating with operatives in foreign rogue nations. Joe Wilson is in touch with the international community and knows what's going on. When the Bush Administration says that they know Iraq has weapons of mass destruction and are working on a nuclear bomb, he goes on the record on many talk shows dismissing this false rumor. Scooter Libby, the trusted Bush aide, exposes Plame as a secret operative in retaliation. Through government intimidation (White House and CIA), the family is pushed to the brink of what any family can tolerate. Also starring in the movie are David Andrews as Scooter Libby, Geoffrey Cantor as Ari Fleischer, James Rutledge and Andy Card, and Sam Shepard as Sam Plame. Fair Game is 108 minutes long and is rated PG-13 for some language. I was afraid that this movie would have super strong liberal overtones and be anti-Republican, but they did a good job of presenting the facts as they were and not trying to spin it in any way. The movie was a bit slow, but not too bad. Overall I enjoyed this averagely. I will give it 3 stars.

The Lost Weekend

2011-04-09T10:29:00.000-07:00

I haven't reviewed an old movie in a while. So here you go. The Lost Weekend is the Academy Award-winning movie from 1945 starring Ray Milland and Jane Wyman. For those of you born after 1980, Jane Wyman was the first wife of former President Ronald Reagan. She also holds the distinction of being the only person to win an Oscar and marry a future President. That's quite an honor! Hillary Clinton never won an Oscar!

In this black and white classic, Ray Milland plays Don Birnem, a alcoholic writer who is left alone for the weekend. His girlfriend and brother try to do what they can to help keep him from drinking, but Birnem is a smart drunk. The movie follows him all weekend from buying more rye, going to the bar, reminiscences of the past, and a hospitalization. Birnem discusses taking his own life and mentions a gun he once had that he hocked for more money for alcohol.

The Lost Weekend was directed by the famous Billy Wilder and is an hour and 40 minutes long. The movie also stars lesser known (to me at least) actors such as Phillip Terry, Howard Da Silva, Doris Dowling, and Frank Faylen.

I definitely like classic movies and I have been trying to watch all of the Academy Award winning movies. Unfortunately, I have to say that this will not be on the top of my list of great movies from the era. The subject matter of the movie is serious, but it lacks an element of thematic drama (is that a real thing?) or maybe some subtle humor to keep the audience in tune.

The Lost Weekend wasn't bad, but it certainly wasn't the kind of movie I'll want to watch again. I'll give it just 3 stars.

The Takers

2011-03-19T08:53:00.001-07:00

I watched The Takers a couple of weeks ago. I saw that it had Matt Dillon, Hayden Christiansen (Anakin Skywalker), and Idris Elba (Stringer Bell - The Wire). Couldn't be that bad, right?

The Takers is an action-packed movie full of unrealistic chase scenes where no one ever gets hurt. Plus the movie hoisted its plot directly from The Italian Job, then replaced the white actors with black actors. I guess when they called the movie The Takers, it meant that they took their plot from someone else.

I wasn't going to word it that way, but after I talked to several people and they said that very same thing I figured it was appropriate. The movie isn't terrible, but I've already seen it. It's difficult to say much more than that. Elba uses his British accent, which may throw you if you've watched The Wire, the realistic show about the high crime and political, union, educational, and media corruption in Baltimore.

In The Takers, Dillon plays this over-zealous tough guy that's just a bit too over the top. I may be understating that. He was way over the top. And he chases the group of bad guys who rob banks and armored cars.

The Takers is Rated R for plot theft, violence, language, and a partially nude scene. The movie is 107 minutes long, as opposed to The Italian Job, which was 110 minutes long. And, by the way, The Italian Job from 2003 with Mark Wahlberg is a remake of the movie of the same name from 1969 staring Michael Caine and Benny Hill.

Despite it's entire lack of originality, The Takers earned a top-notch 1.9 stars. Ugh...

Despicable Me

2011-02-28T18:00:00.000-08:00

Despicable Me is the latest movie from Netflix that I got for my kids. I usually allow for one per month, though it looks like they will also be getting Megamind this month. Well, actually, I think Despicable Me counts as February and Megamind will count as March. So we're good.

Despicable Me is a animated movie (read cartoon) made by Universal Pictures. It stars Steve Carell as Villanious Gru, the evil mad scientist who is plotting to steal world-wide monuments. For his latest swipe he needs the incredible shrinking machine, but younger evil mad scientist Victor "Vector" Perkins (Jason Segal) has swiped it first. Now Gru's only chance of getting the shrinking ray gun is by exploiting the 3 young female orphans: Margo (Miranda Cosgrove, duh - Carly Shay from iCarly!), Edith (Dana Gaier), and Agnes (Elsie Fisher) and having them swipe it. And how in the world did 3 young girls in today's society end up with old lady names like Margo, Edith, and Agnes?

Despicable Me also stars the voices of Julie Andrews as Gru's mother, Russell Brand as Gru's older scientist mentor, Will Arnett as the evil bank administrator, Danny McBride as Gru's neighbor, and Kristen Wiig as Miss Hatie, the mistress of the orphanage.

Rated PG for crude humor and mild action (sounds like something else I know), Despicable Me is 95 minutes long.

My kids loved this movie. It made all of them laugh - the 11 year old, the 9 year old, even my 3 year old. This movie is great for them. I thought it was okay, too. They all lived the little yellow working guys.

Together, we give Despicable Me 4 stars.

Wild Target

2011-02-17T07:43:00.000-08:00

This movie was in my Netflix queue, but as always I requested it from the library, as well. It's always a guessing game as to which will be able to deliver first. Usually it's Netflix. This time it was the library. This time, Netflix isn't even releasing it until March 8th. Win - library.

Wild Target is a British comedy staring Bill Nighy as Victor Maynard, a hired assassin. After deceiving the wrong person in an art deal switch, Rose (Emily Blunt) has a hit put on her by Ferguson (Rupert Everett), the would-be recipient of the art. Maynard is then hired to carry out the hit, but as he's about to carry out the hit, things go wrong and Rose thinks that Maynard was actually trying to save her.

The silly British shenanigans begin. Rose hires Maynard (the man hired to kill her) to protect her and Tony (Rupert Grint), the passer-by who assisted in saving her, who then tags along and decides he wants to be a private detective.

Not to be deceived twice, Ferguson hires a new assassin to kill Rose and Maynard. Now they are on the run. In addition to dealing with his duplicitous relationship with Ferguson, Maynard must also deal with his overbearing assassin-training mother who is disappointed with her son and his inability to fulfill her expectations of him.

Wild Target was directed by Jonathan Lynn who is known for other big hits such as Clue, My Cousin Vinny, and The Whole Nine Yards.

Also starring in the movie are Martin Freeman (Hot Fuzz), Eileen Atkins (Robin Hood, What A Girl Wants & Cold Mountain), and Gregor Fisher. Wild Target rated PG-13 for violence, language, and some sexual situations.

I was moderately amused by this movie. It is full of irony and cerebral humor, qualities that the average movie viewer does not understand nor appreciate. Wild Target was good enough for me to earn 3.5 stars.

Karate Kid

2011-02-16T17:15:00.000-08:00

Karate Kid. No, not the one from the 80's with Ralph Machio and Pat Morita and Elizabeth Shue. This is the remake - no, sequel - no, movie with the same name with different characters in a different city 25 years later? Yep. That's it.

In this "version" of Karate Kid, Dre Parker (the kid) is played by Will Smith's son Jaden Smith. Mr. Miagi is now Mr. Han and he's played by Jackie Chan.

In this 2010 version, Dre and his mother leave Detroit and head to China. Not speaking Chinese well at all, Dre has trouble fitting in. However, he befriends Meiying (Wenwen Han), the cute Chinese girl at his private school. The problem is - there's a bully who doesn't want him around and he doesn't want him to talk to her.

After being beat up a few times, Dre falls under the tutelage of Mr. Han to learn true Kung Fu. And Mr. Han vows to have him fight the bad kids in a tournament. And the bad kids are taught by an instructor who wants his kids to play dirty. Does this sound familiar? It should. Nearly the entire storyline from the original movie is sub-planted in China and reshot using modern high definition film.

If you've never seen the original Karate Kid from 1984 then you're in luck. This 2010 version can stand on its own. I'm not saying it's better. Nor am I saying its worse. It's okay. For those of you stuck in the 80's you probably won't like it because you'll be comparing the two movies the entire time. But don't do that. It's not worth your energy.

Karate Kid has an all-star cast with such headliners as Rongguang Yu, Zhensu Wu, Zhiheng Wang, Zhenwei Wang, and Yi Zhao.

Karate Kid 2010 is 2 hours and 20 minutes in length, so it's a bit long. It is rated PG for martial arts violence, some mild language and bullying. Bullying? Seriously? Yes, it appears that is now one of the attributes used to rate movies.

My kids enjoyed Karate Kid. It was okay for me, too. I will give Karate Kid 3 stars.

The Social Network

2011-02-15T18:02:00.000-08:00

I wasn't going to put The Social Network in my Netflix queue. It just really didn't seem that interesting to me. But my friend, Charm City Kim, recommended that I add it. She liked it. So I added it. Then a few days later I was at the library and low and behold - guess what's sitting on the shelf? The Social Network. Grab movie, remove from queue!

The movie is a true drama (with some artistic interpretation added I'm sure) about Mark Zuckerberg, the inventor of the wildly popular social networking website Facebook.

There's really no spoiler here. Unless you don't read the newspapers and the gossip columns. Mark Zuckerberg was hired by a couple of meat heads from Harvard where Zuckerberg attended college and they asked him to create a webpage for Harvard that could connect the students. He created the site, but then decided to make something bigger to connect students at other colleges across the country.

His adventure had him cross paths with Sean Parker, the kid who invented Napster. Eventually, people decided to start suing him for stealing their ideas, probably when they realized how successful The Facebook was going to be and how much money everyone was going to make.

The Social Network stars Jesse Eisenberg as Mark Zuckerman. You'll remember him from Zombieland and Adventureland, two decent movies. Justin Timberlake stars as Sean Parker. If you're under 30 you'll remember him from one of those boy bands from the 90's. (for the record - I was listening to Stone Templ Pilots and 2Unlimited in the 90's.)

Also staring in the movie are Andrew Garfield, Armie Hammer, Max Minghella, Rooney Mara, Rashida Jones, Brenda Song (London Tiptop from Disney's The Suite Life of Zack & Cody), Malese Jow, and Joseph Mazzello.

The Social Network is considered a 'cerebral' movie and was directed by David Fincher, who's directed other cerebral movies such as The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and Zodiac.

The movie is Rated R for language, some sexuality, and drug and alcohol use. It is just under 2 hours long.

My wife was not a big fan of the movie and she actually wanted to see this one, which is rare. I, however, really liked the movie. I wish I was that smart. But I think I am smart enough to give this movie 4 stars.

The Other Guys

2011-02-11T17:01:00.000-08:00

My wife is a big fan of Will Ferrell. And who didn't like Will Ferrell back when he was funny?

The Other Guys is his latest exploit of a bumbling character who is obsessive and\or compulsive. In this movie, the top cop positions are held by P.K. Highsmith (Samuel L. Jackson) and Officer Christopher Danson (Dwayne Johnson - The Rock). However, opportunity presents itself for lowly desk job cops Allen Gamble (Will Ferrell) and Terry Hoitz (Mark Wahlberg) to move into the top cop position.

Commanded by Captain Gene Mauch (Michael Keaton), officers Gamble and Hoitz seem to go to extremes to prove that they'll never be the top cops.

Also staring in this zany comedy are Eve Mendez as Dr. Sheila Gamble, Allen's beautiful wife, Steve Coogan as (crook\victim), Damon Wayans, Jr. as Officer Fosse, and Rob Riggle.

The Other Guys is directed by Adam McKay who has done other Will Ferrell movies such as Anchorman, Talladega Nights, and Step Brothers.

The movie is rated PG-13 for language that includes sexually explicit conversation, some violence, fire arms, and drug use (actual or implied).

I thought the movie was fairly funny. It's certainly no Anchorman, but I got a few good laughs out of it. I would give The Other Guys 3.6 stars.

The Romantics

2011-02-11T17:00:00.000-08:00

Note to self - I'm not enjoying the latest string of romantic dramas. Especially the Indie ones.

As you can already guess, I'm not a big fan of The Romantics. I can't even remember why I put it in my Netflix queue. Was it because Katie Holmes was in it? Or Anna Paquin? Or Malin Akerman? It was probably one of those. Who knows.

The movie is about some rich egotistical misguided young adults who have trudged through treachory, deception, and sexual escapades with each other for a while. I know this because they are staying in a big waterfront house in New England.

The Romantics is actually being sold as a movie about a young couple getting married and their friends and family coming together to celebrate. The only problem is that the bride Lila (Anna Paquin) is marrying Tom (Josh Duhamel), but Tom is actually the ex-lover boyfriend of Lila's sister Laura (Katie Holmes). Now there's some drama.

What's up with films about failing relationships right at the wedding? Remember the other wedding drama meltdown movie - Margot at the Wedding? Three Weddings an a Funeral? Runaway Bride? The Wedding Singer? Are disaster weddings like car accidents? Do we love to see people suffer?

Anyway, The Romantics is full of drama, maybe a little bit of romance, a lot of drinking, some pretty funny toasts, and many awkward moments. One thing that I really did like was the background music played during the wedding. I laughed out loud at that.

The Romantics is rated PG-13 for some brief nudity (a butt in the dark!), language, drinking, some naughty girls in their underwear, and some kissing of people who shouldn't be kissing.

Directed by Grant Niederhoffer, The Romantics also stars Elijah Wood (of Lord of the Rings), Jeremy Strong, Candice Bergen, Adam Brody, Dianne Argon, and Rebecca Lawrence, most of whom I never heard.

So all in all, this hour and 30 minute movie is way long and slow and filled with too much angst for me. I can only give it 2.2 stars. Blah!

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps

2011-02-06T06:57:00.001-08:00

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps is the sequal to the original Wall Street movie staring Michael Douglas and Charlie Sheen. This time, more than 20 years later, Gordon Gekko is out of prison and he's ready to make right with his life. Or is he?

Gekko's daughter Winnie (Carey Mulligan) is dating Wall Street trader Jake (Shia LeBouf - who I swear is not interested in the daughters of former money makes; or any daughters for that matter, but I digress). In basically what is a replay of the original movie, some big firm goes down and everyone is left with their hat in hand wondering what to do next.

Wanting his girlfriend to make-up with her just released from prison father, Jake meets with Gekko to talk business. Soon thereafter, Jake is working for Gekko's arch-rival Bretton James (Josh Brolin).

Things don't go as smoothly as you would have expected in the reunification attempt for a convicted white-collar criminal who ruined his family and made a spectacle of everything. But as they say, what goes around comes around.

This movie deals mostly with the credit and real estate bubbles of this decade. It runs like an economics and financial documentary for much of the movie. It's full of back-stabbing and much of the same from the original movie.

For comical entertainment, Charlie Sheen makes a cameo appearance that is absolutely pathetic. To me it appeared to be a plug for the original movie. Are they pushing DVD sales? And if you hadn't seen the original movie it would not have been relevant to you.

But all's well in the end, right?

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps is directed by fear-mongering conspiracy theorist Oliver Stone. Also staring in the movie are liberal titan Susan Sarandon, Frank Langella, John Bedford Lloyd, and Oliver Stone. There are also cameos by Wall Street media moguls Jim Cramer, Maria Bartaromo, and David Faber from NBC's business channel CNBC.

The movie is rated PG-13 for some language, one scene of implied violence, deceit, and cerebral economic discussions.

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps is more of a sentimental movie for people who love the 80's. There is not much cinematic value to this movie. I mean - is it realistic that some 22 year old kid is some power broker? He really leaped over the 40 year olds who have been working the street for 20 years??? I fully expect there to be another Stone movie about the next economic bubble with accusations against the greedy corporate money whores.

The movie isn't terrible. It's got it's witty one-liners, but it's just.....eh.

I give Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps 2.9 stars.

Machete

2011-02-06T06:17:00.000-08:00

Machete is an action comedy that shows the conflicting and often hypocritical interests in dealing with the millions of illegal aliens that cross in from Mexico every year.

When Mexican Federale Machete (Danny Trejo) is double-crossed, attacked, and left for dead, he is forced to flee May-hi-co and remain in the underground.

Several years later, superstar border agent Sartana Rivera (Jessica Alba) comes across him while monitoring action of the taco truck run by underground leader Luz (Michelle Rodriguez). In South Texas, tensions are high with the keeping out illegal aliens. Texas Senator John McLaughlin is running for reelection on the platform of killin' 'em and closing the borders.

Meanwhile, Machete is finding his way around Texas. He is found fighting handsomely in the streets and is recruited by Von Jackson (Don Johnson) to assassinate the Senator. Meanwhile, the Mexican Mafia is led by Torrez (Steven Seagal) who is giving orders from south of the border .

The movie sports an all-star cast that also includes Cheech Marin, Lindsay Lohan (who is entirely naked throughout most of the movie), and Jeff Fahey.

Machete is Rated R for lots of nudity (boobies and buttocks - including Jessica Alba), violence (including decapitations and torso thrashings), and language. The violence in many scenes would almost be considered cartoonish. Just tons of blood. Everywhere. And severed limbs.

This movie is ridiculous. As an example, there is one scene where there is an entire courtyard brawl with guns and swords and machetes. Someone pulls out a machine gun and shoots all of the swords and guns and machetes and no one is hurt. Nearly everyone in the movie gets killed. Several people are gored entirely through their torso, but are able to continue their conversation for several more minutes before they die.

I read a couple of reviews and it said that the movie dealt with the conflicts of illegal immigration. I get that many businesses want the illegal immigration for its artificial low wages. But others want to close the borders because they are stealing jobs from Americans. To me, this movie was just an opportunity to make Americans look like a bunch of uneducated racist rednecks, thus making it easier to stomach killing them.

One positive was it was interesting to see Robert DeNiro not be a New York gangster. The other positive - lots of naked girls. If it weren't for all of the skin in the movie, I would have given this 1 star. But because of that bias, I'll go as high as 2.2.

The Expendables

2011-02-01T18:19:00.000-08:00

Action. Screaming. Blood. Tough guys. Gore. Shooting. Explosions. Grunting. Fire. Smoke. If this is your idea of a movie, shout out "BINGO" because I found a winner.

If you want a movie with tough guys from the 80's trying to recapture a little of their glory, The Expendables was made with you in mind.

In what would have been considered an all-star cast in 1984, The Expendables has true grit. Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis, Jason Stratham, Dolph Lundgren, Mickey Rourke, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Steve Austin. The only ones we're missing are Jean Claude van Damme and Steven Seagal.

What's the plot? Not sure. I think they're sent on a mission to blow stuff up, but they get shot at and have to leave, but only to decide that they need to return to save the girl and blow up some more stuff. And kill the bad guys.

The Expendables is Rated R for language, some sequences of graphic violence (those sequences last throughout the entire movie), and a face by Sylvester Stallone that will make you cringe.

I got through The Expendables only because it was so ridiculous that it was funny. These guys should not be making action movies any more. They were just silly. I can hardly bring myself to give this movie 2 stars.

Red

2011-01-30T14:21:00.000-08:00

In Bruce Willis' latest super secret agent movie, he plays Frank Moses, an ex-CIA secret operative who is in retirement, but is forced out of retirement when he learns that someone has a hit out on him. To make matters worse, these hitmen are also after the phone representative girl (Mary-Louise Parker) that he calls everyday because he's in love with her. Now he must save himself, and her. And he's never met her.

Assisting him on the hunt for the person who put out a hit on him are former ex-CIA secret operatives Nelson Mandella (who convincingly played Morgan Freeman once in a movie - or was it the other way around?), John Malkovich (who starred in Being John Malkovich), and Helen Mirren.

Also staring in the movie are 200 year old Ernest Borgnine, Richard Dreyfuss, Julian McMahon, and Karl Urban.

An interesting point about Julian McMahon - he played the Vice President running for President in the movie. In real life, McMahon is the son of a former Prime Minister of Australia - Sir William McMahon.

Red, which stands for Retired Extremely Dangerous, is more of an action comedy. There were plenty of parts that made me laugh. There is a lot of shooting, not a lot of blood, and a curse word here and there. The movie is rated PG-13 for said shooting and language.

I was adequately entertained by Red and it's nearly continuous sequence of action. I find it suffice to give it 3.5 stars.

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World

2011-01-27T16:48:00.000-08:00

I haven't really reviewed older movies lately. But this movie had so many freakin' people in it I just had to write about it.

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World starts when Smiler Grogan (Jimmy Durante) wrecks his car as he careens off of a cliff somewhere in the outback of California. Several car loads of people witness this accident and they all race to the car to see if he's okay. Nearing his last breath, he tells them that there's $350,000 buried beneath the big "W" in the park in Santa Rosita. Seconds later - he's dead.

The mad dash starts as the onlookers race across the state to get to Santa Rosita to get the money. Unbeknownst to them, Captain T.G. Culpepper is on to them and let's them lead him to the money. You see - he's been waiting for a break in the case for 20 years in order to find this money.

So here's a list of the people who star in the movie. If you're a well-rounded person, you'll probably know most, if not all, of them. Spencer Tracy, Milton Berle, Sid Caesar, Buddy Hackett,
Ethel Merman, Mickey Rooney, Dick Shawn, Phil Silvers, Jonathan Winters, Jim Backus, Peter Faulk, Norman Fell, Buster Keaton, Don Knotts, Carl Reiner, Dorothy Provine, Jack Benny, Jimmy Durante, Ron Howard, Jerry Lewis, Eddie "Rochester" Robinson, and the Three Stooges - Moe Howard, Larry Fine, and Curley Joe.

The movie is about 2 hours and 41 minutes long - which wasn't all that uncommon in the 1960's. The movie is not rated (pre-rating era), but the most scandalous thing to come out of the movie was when Ethyl Merman flashed her bloomers when she fell.

This is a great zany goof-ball comedy that anyone who appreciates classic movies will love. If you haven't seen this movie, put it on your list.

I give this movie 4.2 stars.

Cyrus

2011-01-25T09:46:00.001-08:00

I don't know why I keep torchering myself with Jonah Hill movies. He's a fat obnoxious kid with a potty-mouth. I get enough of that from the cashiers at Best Buy. I guess the rest of the cast had me more interested in this movie.

Cyrus is the name of the title character played by Jonah Hill. He's an overweight psychotic kid (not a difficult role for Jonah to play) living with his mother, Molly, played by Maris Tomei (now we're talking, right???). She's a single mom.

Coming into the picture is John, played by John C. Reilly, Will Farrell's friend. He chose to play the role of John because he's already named John and that would be easy for him to remember. He's a divorcee wandering aimlessly in life, but his ex-wife Jamie (Catherine Keener - not bad for a 50+ year lady!) is encouraging him to meet other women.

When John meets Molly, they hit it off right away. But soon John will have to meet Cyrus. And Cyrus wants Mommy all to himself.

This dry independent comedy was directed by Jay and John Duplass. Cyrus is Rated R for language and some sexual material. I don't recall any nudity, but that's not important, is it?

As much as Jonah Hill irritates me (at least his characters irritate me), I thought this movie was somewhat funny and tolerable. Definitely not a 'watch it again' kind of movie. I will give it a slightly below average 2.9 stars.

Buried

2011-01-23T17:07:00.000-08:00

Ryan Reynolds is really doing a good job trying to be a well-rounded actor. He's done romantic comedy - The Proposal, action - X-Men Origins, goofy comedy - Adventureland, and dramas - The Nines. This time, he does a different kind of drama, this time in the new movie war movie Buried.

Reynolds plays Paul Conroy, a contractor who is working in war-torn Iraq driving a truck for a private trucking company. He wakes up in a coffin-like box, buried somewhere in the desert. He finds that he has some items in the box with him - a lighter, a cellphone, a pencil, a flashlight, and some kind of light device (the kind that you snap and it comes on - gives that greenish glow).

Conroy tries calling people back in the states for help. 911. His wife. A mistress? His company. The State Department. Is everyone asleep? What's going on?

As he lies in the box it begins to leak sand and time starts to run out. Can the Americans track his signal and save him before it's too late. Does he have what it takes to survive?

The entire movie is shot from within the box. This has to be the smallest stage-set in the history of movies.

The only other person you see in the movie is a fellow contractor, but you see her through the video on his cellphone.

Buried is Rated R for language and some violence. It is a very suspenseful movie.

It certainly was interesting and I was in it for the long-hull. I can't comment further without giving the movie away. I'll just say that I'll give it 3 stars. You'll have to watch it yourself and let me know if you agree.

The A-Team

2011-01-15T11:25:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite shows as a child. I'm sure you remember this intoduction:

In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum-security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem...if no one else can help...and if you can find them...maybe you can hire...The A- Team.

In 6th grade we had to write an episode of a television show for our creative writing project. Of course I chose the A-Team, and recorded the theme song off of the television onto a cassette and played it before my script was read to the class. Yes, I was a dork. Still am a dork???

Anyway, in the latest installment of making tv shows from our childhood into movies, the A-Team was finally released, staring Liam Neeson as the cigar-chomping Hannible Smith, Bradley Cooper as Face, Quinton Jackson as "BA"Baracus, and Sharlto Copley as Murdoch.

Dwight Schultz and Dirk Benedict make cameo appearances in the movie. They originally played Murdoch and Face in the original television series. Mr. T was not in the movie and George Peppard (Hannible) has been dead for years. Additionally, Gerald McRaney makes a cameo. You may remember him from Simon and Simon or Major Dad if you're a bit younger.

The movie follows the classic A-Team style. Someone framed them. They have to find them and resolve it and escape while being pursued by evil government agents. Much of the movie is like watching your kid play a combat game on the Wii. The dialog is just okay - much like the television show. Lot's of outlandish action, though.

Also staring in the movie are Jessica Biel as one of the agents who is pursuing them, but then comes to believe they are innocent, and Patrick Wilson as the unwavering CIA agent chasing them.

Directed by Joe Carnahan, who was a kid himself when the show aired, The A-Team is rated PG-13 for many fake explosions and gun fire that never seems to hit anyone. The movie is just under 2 hours long.

The A-Team was a bit of a novelty for me. Had this been a stand-alone movie with no reference to a television show from my childhood, I probably would have hated it. However, since it wasn't a stand-alone movie, then I shall give it 3.1 stars.

Knight and Day

2011-01-12T17:08:00.000-08:00

I'm always hesitant to watch a Tom Cruise movie. Come on - the guy is absolutely off of his rocker. He made Brooke Shields cry because he said she's not as cool as him. What a punk!

I used to be a big fan of Cameron Diaz, (Was there something about Cameron?) until she started dating some dude from some boy band who dressed like he was protecting an inner-city street corner. I think his name is Justin Timberlake.

Anyway, both of these overly-glorified actors recently starred in the released-to-DVD movie Knight and Day. It's a play on words. In the movie, Cruise and Diaz are known as Miller and Havens, but that would not have stoked as much interest as Knight and Day, but Knight does come into play as you will find.

Cruise plays a secret operative (imagine that) and Diaz plays an unsuspecting victim (imagine that) who just happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. However, through their trials and tribulations, Miller learns that Havens wouldn't make such a bad secret agent herself.

Would they eventually be able to work together to save the world?

Knight and Day also stars Peter Sarsgaard, who's been in such B movies as Rendition, The Mysteries of Pittsburgh, K-19, and an Education.

Directed by James Mangold (3:10 to Yuma, Walk the Line, and Girl Interrupted), Knight and Day is rated PG-13 for circus violence, G-fab computer graphics, and some naughty words and some sexual innuendo. The movie is just about 2 hours long.

I actually didn't think Knight and Day was that bad. Tom Cruise doesn't seem to be pompous, but rather competent and matter-of-fact. I would say the movie is more about Cameron Diaz' character.

I give Knight and Day 3.2 stars. If you can't find any of the top-shelf movies to watch, this one will entertain you for the evening. You probably wouldn't care to see it twice, but once is okay.

True Grit (2010)

2010-12-31T10:38:00.001-08:00

I'm not in the habit of going to the movies. In fact, I cannot remember the last time I went to the movies. It may have been to see I Am Legend, the Will Smith movie. And I'm pretty sure the last movie that my wife and I saw together was Bridges of Madison County. That tells you how much I like going to the movies.

I went to the movies because we subscribe to the Baltimore Sun (that's a newspaper - it's made of paper and is sometimes delivered to your house and has news...sometimes). This newspaper has a contests section and she won 2 tickets to see True Grit. Not being a predictable romantic comedy, my wife had no interest in seeing it. So I rounded up a friend and we went to see the premier in Hunt Valley, Maryland.

True Grit is a remake of the 1969 movie of the same name starring the late John Wayne, Glen Campbell (who used to have a career before the heavy drinking and the run-in's with the law), and Kim Darby.

This new version stars Jeff Bridges as Rooster J. Cogburn, the Marshall for hire, Matt Damon as Texas Ranger La Boeuf (pronounced Le-beef), and Hailee Steinfeld, the up-and-coming 14 year old actress as Mattie Ross, the young girl out to avenge her father's murder, and Josh Brolin as the irrascable Tom Chaney, the murder of said father.

The premise of the movie is that Mattie's father is murdered by a drunkard and she goes to town and hires Rooster Cogburn to find her father's killer and bring him to justice. La Boeuf shows up with a warrant for Chaney's arrest of a different crime. Mattie Ross is a strong determined young lady who will have nothing that is not her way. And together the 3 of them head off into Indian Country to find Chaney.

Though not a comedy, Jeff Bridges plays the character of Cogburn with such flair that it is hysterical. The combination of Rooster with the straight-laced La Boeuf and the head-strong Mattie makes for an excellent combination. Unfortuantely, I had not seen the orignial before I saw this remake. But I must say that I was thoroughly impressed with this movie. In fact, I would say it is my favorite movie of the year. Jeff Bridges deserves an Oscar for his performance. Heck, Hailee Steinfeld deserves one, too.

The movie was directed by the Coen brothers, Ethan and Joel, and produced by them with the support of Scott Rudin, and Steven Spielberg. True Grit is rated PG-13 for violence and a snake.

I give True Grit, the 2010 remake a full 5 stars.

Netflix Throttling

2010-09-09T05:34:00.001-07:00

On Tuesday a coworker stopped by my desk with a couple of Netflix DVD's in his hand. This reminded me that I needed to return my Netflix movie. We dropped them into the mailbox at the corner of our building at the same time.

The next day I checked to see which movie I got and my queue still showed my previous DVD. I emailed that coworker and he said that his movies were received and two new movies showed that they were being delivered.

Okay, Netflix. Pretending that you didn't get my movies? It's not like I'm doing anything that violates the rules. You send me the movie on Thursday. I watch the movie on Thursday night. I put the movie back in the mail on Friday morning. Is that worth messing with me?

Cemetery Junction

2010-08-20T16:34:00.000-07:00

Ricky Gervais seems to be the biggest British comedian since Mr. Bean. I got a kick out of him in The Invention of Lying, so when I saw that he was in another British comedy, I quickly added it to my queue.

Ricky isn't the star of this Cemetery Juncton, though he stars in it, but he does direct the flick.

Three bloaks from a blue-collar town are deciding their future when Freddie (Christian Cooke) decides to take up the seemingly more successful path of selling life insurance in order to escape his current existence. While making his rounds, he runs into an old girlfriend Julie (Felicity Jones) who happens to be the daughter of the company.

She seems to fold him into her world and now he is faced with having her in his life and keeping up his friendships with the goofy ill-timed profanity spewing Snork (Jack Doolan) and the more suave Bruce (Tom Hughes).

The movie moves a bit slow, and everyone talks with a thick British accent (I know - in a British movie - how crazy!). And if you like jokes about bloaks and poofters, you'll dig this movie. If you have no idea what a bloak or a poofter is, you'll be lost. You definitely need to pay attention to this movie to appreciate it.

Cemetery Junction is rated R for British crude language and some minor sexual references. The movie is 95 minutes long. The movie also stars Ralph Fiennes and Emily Watson.

I need to make a note that I'm not a huge fan of British romantic comedies. Sure, I like Monty Python. And I thought Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels was funny, but I'm just not into the most British comedies. I know some of my friends will be disappointed. I guess I'm not as much of a Tory as they are.

I can only give Cemetery Junction 2.5 stars.

O

2010-08-16T18:45:00.001-07:00

Greenberg

2010-08-16T18:18:00.000-07:00

Ben Stiller is always good for laugh. I mean, there was Dodgeball, Zoolander, the two Nights as the Museums, the whole Fockers series. He's not the funniest character out there, but he's funny enough that I'll watch his new movies.

Greenberg is his latest adventure where he plays a neurotic Roger Greenberg who recently gets out of the mental hospital and is asked by his brother to watch their house while they are away on vacation.

Meanwhile, his brother's assistant, Florence (Greta Gerwig), comes around and helps Roger get by with all of the house chores. Since Roger doesn't drive or know anything about dogs, the weak and impressionable Florence is there to help him out.

In the meantime, Roger, who is lonely and looking for a new start in life, starts to fall for Florence, but his violent outbursts and inability to accept any accountability for his actions, begins to wear thin on Florence. Can Roger turn this awkward forced relationship into something romantic that will last, or will like everything else in his life, be something fleeting that just passes him by?

Greenberg was directed by Noah Baumbach, who directed the nearly intolerable Margot at the Wedding. Greenberg is rated R for strong sexuality, language, lots of drug and alcohol use and some minor violence.

Greenberg is definitely a dark comedy. I did fine humor in many of the scenes, though I found everyone to be a bit predictable. The movie is about an hour and 40 minutes long.

The movie also stars Rhys Ifans, Jennifer Jason Leigh (Fast Times at Ridgemont High), and what I hope to be an up-and-coming Brie Larson.

Greenberg wasn't too bad. It's not my favorite Ben Stiller movie, though I have to admit that I'm not a huge fan of dark comedies. However, this one was good enough to earn it 3.1 stars.

The Ghost Writer

2010-08-15T18:46:00.000-07:00

When Ewen MacGregor is hired to be the ghost writer of a former British Prime Minister, he finds himself in a situation more than he bargained for.

After the first assistant drowns, MacGregor is brought to a secluded island in what appears to be coastal Massachusetts, to write the memoirs of Adam Lang (Pierce Brosnan). The conditions that MacGregor is subject to seem a bit odd and he starts to snoop around to find out what is really going on. However, he finds out that there are some important powerful people that will do anything to ensure that certain facts are never known.

There is quite a dramatic ending in many aspects. But some of it seems a bit too convenient as a way to tie the story together.

Directed by pedophile Roman Polanski, The Ghost Writer is a little over 2 hours long and is rated PG-13 for language, brief nudity, some sexuality, some violence and a drug reference.

Also staring in the movie are Kim Katrell as Lang's assistant, James Belushi, Olivia Williams, Timothy Hutton, and Tom Wilkinson.

This movie is so SLOW. There are long scenes of mundane conversation that add very little to the plot of the movie. I know they wanted the suspense, but they added suspense to the suspense. Get on with it! And they ending - give me a break.

I give The Ghost Writer 2.1 stars.

When in Rome

2010-08-14T18:51:00.001-07:00

I had seen a string of guy movies, so I slipped in a romantic comedy for my wife. And after having seen Kristen Bell in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and Couples Retreat, I knew I liked what I saw.

When in Rome stars Kristen Bell as single gal Beth Martin in Rome for her sister's wedding where (Alexis Dziena) she meets Nicholas Beamon (Josh Duhamel) where they sort of feed off of each other's clumsiness.

The night turns odd when Beth, all drunk and feeling pitiful when she sees Nicholas with another woman, starts pulling coins and chips out of the water fountain, and magically changing the lives and romantic interests of several guys - Lance (Jon Heder - Napolean Dynamite), Gale (Dax Shepard), Antonio (Will Arnett - Gob from Arrested Development), and Al Russo (Danny DeVito).

These guys nearly qualify as the biggest dorks around. And once Beth learns that her suitors are under a spell, she must find out how to undo the spell so that they stop chasing her. The problem is the one she likes (Nicholas) is also under the spell. Does he really like her because he's under the spell or does he have true feelings for her?

When in Rome also co-stars Don Johnson as Beth's dad and Angelica Houston as Beth's boss, with cameos from Lawrence Taylor and Shaquille O'Neal.

When in Rome is rated PG-13 for some suggestive comments. The movie is 91 minutes too long.

The comedy is zany and goofy and nonsensical. I found myself wanting this movie to be over. And quick. It was so ridiculous. And my wife started hating the movie before I did. Netflix thought I'd give it 4 stars. They were way off on their algorithms. I can only give it 1.9 stars. This one is a pooper.

From Paris With Love

2010-07-29T19:29:00.001-07:00

From Paris With Love stars Jonathan Rhys Myers as James Reece as a low-level bureaucrat at a foreign office in Paris who is looking for that jump up the ladder and the accompanying excitement that it will bring.

Without warning, Reece is thrust into an international espionage ring and teamed with lunatic agent Charlie Wax (John Travolta). Reece gets all the excitement he can handle. Meanwhile, people are getting shot-up, drugs are everywhere, and now he finds himself in grave danger.

To complicate matters, there's a mole in the circle and Reece is forced to confront his biggest fears. For entertainment value, Travolta is an absolute nut who just happens to know everything, sort of like a super agent who's totally lucky ALL the time.

From Paris With Love also stars big names such as Kasia Smutnia, François Bredo, and Mostéfa Stit. It's amazing that director Pierre Morel was able to attract such famous actors.

The movie is rated R for violence, drug use, language, violence, and situations that are much too convenient to resemble reality. From Paris With Love is 93 minutes long, 13 minutes long if you watch it on a faster speed.

While the comedic entertainment value is there, this movie is a no-brainer. You're not really contemplating the intellectual complexity of the crimes. There's nothing to think about. It's all given to you. The only thing you're doing is counting bodies and shaking your darn head at the things that Travolta says.

I give From Paris With Love 2.7 stars.

Book of Eli

2010-07-15T19:19:00.000-07:00

So as I mentioned in my previous movie review, there has been a plethora of dystopian movies lately. And here's another one to add to the flaming pile.

The Book of Eli stars Denzel Washington as Eli. Eli is walking across the county, across a deserted wasteland. Again, we're not sure what the apocalypse was, but something happened and everybody is pissed. Chaos is the government of the land.

Along the way, while fighting roving bands of miscreants, he finds Solara (Mila Kunis), the daughter of a blind woman (Jennifer Beals) in a town run by a thug named Carnegie (Gary Oldman). Together they walk across the land fighting evil, hoping to make it to some promise land at the other end.

After beating up everyone in his path and dodging bullets like he was in The Matrix, Eli gets to his destination where hope is planting it's seed.

Directed by Albert and Allen Hughes, The Book of Eli is rated R for violence and language and literary abuse (retelling a story that's already been told). The movie is about 2 hours long.

I usually like Denzel Washington. However, this film seems a bit too familiar. In fact, I kept expecting him to run into a wayward father and son going in the other direction. And the movie was filmed with the same color filter that all other dystopian movies use.

For the stated reasons, I feel compelled to give this movie no better than 2 stars. Booo!

The Road

2010-07-13T19:18:00.000-07:00

Apocalyptic movies seem to be all the rage over the last few years. There's Terminator, Cloverfield, I Am Legend, and The Day After Tomorrow. Now we have The Road.

In The Road, a father and son are walking across the country to the blue part of the map where they hear that things are better. We're not sure what the apocalypse was, but it killed nearly everyone and now the survivors are cannibals. Along the way, the father constantly is teaching his son about survival and as the movie progresses, you get the feeling that the father is dying.

Seen through a color filter and nothing but gloomy skies, the movie is very depressing and lacks any hope. There are glimpses of light now and then, but only to be dashed by fate.

Viggo Mortenson stars as father, the unnamed man, Kodi Smit-McPhee as the unnamed son, Charlize Theron as the mother of the son and wife of Viggo as seen through flash-backs throughout the movie. And Robert Duvall makes a cameo appearance as a vagabond homeless person and Guy Pearce as a fellow traveler.

The movie is rated R for disturbing cannibalism, violence, and language, and possibly for lack of color. The Road is 111 minutes long.

The story seemed too similar to the other doomsday movies. The book actually won a Pulitzer Prize in 2007. However, the story was long and tired and would probably have difficulty keeping the attention of the average American. I give The Road 2 1/2 stars.

Youth In Revolt

2010-07-06T19:19:00.000-07:00

For a while I was a big Michael Cera fan. If you didn't like Arrested Development, then you have no sense of humor. Then there was Juno and Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist.

However, Cera's stock is now going down. Super Bad - too many F-bombs. Paper Heart - stinker. Now we have Youth in Revolt.

I saw the previews from another movie. Seemed like a pretty funny movie. A nerdy young kid named Nick Twisp falls for a girl and his devilish side comes out - only in a real human character. The only problem is - the previews pretty much showed all of the funny parts, a common problem with today's comedies.

Youth in Revolt also stars Portia Doubleday as the attractive young love interest of Nick Twisp. Adding comedic value are Ray Liotta who plays the love interest of Nick's mother, played by Mary Kay Place, and Steve Buscemi as his father, Justin Long as his pot-smoking neighbor, and Fred Willard as the awkward family friend.

Directed by Michael Artera, Youth in Revolt is Rated R for sexual content, language, and drug use. The movie is 90 minutes long.

The movie definitely has its funny parts. Had I not seen the previews I would have been much more entertained. For rating purposes, we'll assume I didn't see the previews. That will get it up to 3 stars.

Defendor

2010-06-15T06:33:00.000-07:00

Not a well-publicized movie, but an interesting movie, nonetheless.

Defendor stars Woody Harrelson as Arthur Poppington, a man of lower intelligence under the grasp of demons from his childhood. Now a man, Arthur decides to go after the people that are bad - the kinds of people that hurt his mother and made his life scary.

Poppington dresses up in a superhero disguise, calls himself Defendor, but has no special powers. But he does have a lot of nifty ideas. Marbles anyone?

The story is told from memory as Poppington is talking to a psychiatrist (Sandra Oh). When Defendor seeks to destroy the Empire of Industry he comes across a prostitute (Kat Dennings) whom he suspects is being harmed, so he saves her. And she subsequently becomes the love interest.

However, in his quest to rid the town of the bad guys, he accidentally comes across a crooked cop and some actual bad guys. Not having real powers, Defedor finds himself in a tough situation, more than good friend Paul (Michael Kelly) has the ability to help him. Defendor now needs to find a way to win and he's not going to let anything stop him.

Defendor is rated R for violence, language, and some sexual situations. Directed by Peter Stebbings, the movie is an hour and 40 minutes long.

I give Defendor 3 stars. It was a combination of an action movie, a drama, and a comedy. There were parts of the movie that were very sad. Other parts were just plain old silly. As the poster correctly shows - "Darkly Funny". That is a very accurate description of Defendor. Not a bad movie.

Leap Year

2010-06-15T06:02:00.000-07:00

Just because I haven't posted a movie review in over a month does not mean that I haven't been watching movies. To the contrary - I've watched a lot of movies. But I'd rather watch movies than write about them. Not to say I don't enjoy writing about the movies. It's like choosing between Reese Witherspoon and Anne Hathaway. I enjoy both.

So anyway, last Friday I watched another Amy Adams movie - Leap Year. It was a romantic comedy - like nearly all of Amy Adams' movies.

In Leap Year, Amy is a pretentious stick in the mud who is dating a pretentious businessman who little convincing aptitude for love. After a disappointing night where she expected to get engaged, she decides that she will propose to him - while in Ireland - on February 29th - leap year.

This is where Amy runs into a series of unfortunate events. Stranded in a town in Southern Ireland, she meets up with Declan (Matthew Goode), whom she convinces to help her get to Dublin so that she can propose.

Declan, however, can see right threw her and is more in touch with what is going on that she realizes, or cares to accept. So you can already tell what is going to happen. She spends a lot of time with him in her journey to get to Dublin. And he drives her crazy.

Predictable. Very predictable. But again, it's a romantic comedy. They are supposed to be soft non-thinking movies. And that it is.

The movie also stars John Lithgow as Amy's father and Adam Scott as her boyfriend.

Directed by Anand Tucker, Leap Year is rated PG. I think this was because 2 unmarried people slept in the same bed and there was some kissing later in the movie. And she got mad a lot. You could totally let your 10 year old watch this movie.

At an hour and 37 minutes long, it is the perfect length.

I give Leap Year 3 stars. Average. It met the formula for a romantic comedy, thus achieving mediocrity.

Fantastic Mr. Fox

2010-04-12T19:55:00.000-07:00

One of over 400 movies that George Clooney starred in during 2009, Fantastic Mr. Fox is a stop-motion movie about Mr. Fox who raids farms and steals birds. To eat, of course. His wife, Mrs. Fox (Meryl Streep), talks him out of stealing and he eventually becomes a writer for the local newspaper.

Feeling like his life is going nowhere, Fox plans to start raiding farms again. However, the farmers are on to him and they begin to make life hard on the animals. Now it's up to Mr. Fox to save the day.

The movie is an animated adaptation of the Roald Dohl children's book. The movie also stars the voices of Bill Murry, the opossum, Jason Schwartzman, Cate Blanchett, Willem Defoe, and Owen Wilson.

The movie was directed by Wes Anderson, who is known for The Darjeerling Limited, The Royal Tenenbaums, and Rushmore. The Fantastic Mr. Fox is rated PG for smoking (gasp!), smoking, and some mild violence (including shooting of guns - gasp!).

The Fantastic Mr. Fox is very melodramatic. There is very little inflection in the dialog and the humor is very dry. VERY dry. It's drier than a $4 bottle of white wine. Both of my kids watched the movie and neither got into it very much. And neither did their Papa.

This was not my favorite kids movie, nor my favorite dry humor movie. I just didn't find it all that funny. For this I can only give it 2 stars.

Did You Hear About the Morgans?

2010-04-11T19:26:00.000-07:00

For some reason I had it in my head that this movie starred Morgan Freeman, even though a split second later after each time I thought that I knew it didn't.

Did You Hear About the Morgan's is actually a romantic comedy that stars Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker as Paul and Meryl Morgan. Though going through a divorce, they happen to witness a murder by a wanted mafia lord, so in order to protect them, the FBI puts them into the Witness Protection Program. Unfortunately for this divorcing couple, they are sent to Wyoming together.

Once in Wyoming, they hook up with the local Sheriff and his wife, Clay and Emma Wheeler (Sam Elliott and Mary Steenburgen) who hide them until the case is solved.

One of the driving themes of the movie is that the Morgan's are raging liberals dropped into the middle of hill-billy redneck country, a place where Republicans live.

While hiding out, Paul and Meryl are forced to be with each other, while simultaneously trying to run their businesses from afar and not getting found by the mafia.

Watchers of the movie will be on the edge of their seats to find out if they will be able to solve all three problems without a hitch.

Directed by Marc Lawrence, who also directed Music and Lyrics and Two Week Notice, two other Hugh Grant movies, Did You Hear About the Morgans? is rated PG-13 for some sexual references, some minor violence, and a bad Sarah Palin quip. The movie is an hour and 43 minutes long.

The movie was corny and stereotyped rednecks and Republicans (who, according to the movie are one in the same). Less concerning was the movie's total predictability. As romantic comedies go, this one was not that good. I did laugh out loud a couple of times, saving this movie from being terrible. I give Did You Hear About the Morgans? two stars.

Hardbodies

2010-04-09T18:09:00.001-07:00

Every now and then I feel the need to indulge in some guilty pleasures. Outside of porn, what fits this bill better than an 80's beach sex comedy? And Hardbodies it is.

I remember sneaking down into the basement at like 2 in the morning when I was 12 or 13 in order to watch this movie. There was no way my parents were going to let me watch this. Well, a very very remote chance that my dad would have let me watch it if I didn't tell anyone, so my best shot was scoping the TV Guide for movies in the middle of the night. You did this, too, right?

And as far as Hardbodies is concerned, I mean, just looking at the cover of the movie you know what you're getting. And at 13 I wasn't disappointed. This was one of my favorite movies of all time. And then I saw it as an adult.

I really didn't remember the plot, just that there was a lot of skin, but as it happens, a young beach bum with glorious feathered hair gets kicked out of his place and needs to find another one in which to live. Meanwhile, 3 "older" men show up looking for a good time (Hunter, Rounder, and Ashby; Gary Wood, Michael Rapport, and Sorrells Pickens, respectively). The most notable person in the movie is probably the red-headed Courtney Gains who went on to play bit roles in several prominent movies.

Anyway, unable to pick up girls and sensing these old men needed help, Scotty (Grant Cramer) plots to manipulate them and convinces them to put him up and teach them the way to get hot girls. Tension builds, however, when Scotty's girlfriend Kristi (Teal Roberts) thinks he's having too much fun with all the naked girls.

If you're looking for a thin plot, bad acting, and lots of bouncing round boobs, then you've found your movie. If you want a hysterical romantic comedy full of anecdotes and creative use of dialog, then you are way off.

Directed by Mark Griffith, who was known for other big hits such as Beethoven's 5th and National Lampoon's Going the Distance, Hardbodies is about an hour and a half long and is rated R for boobies, language, some fisticuffs, boobs, butts, and bouncing boobs.

What is funny is that many of my friends are eager to borrow this movie. I think it's the 13 year old in my friends that wants to sneak downstairs at 2am to see this movie. And that 13 year old would give this movie 5 stars, but his 37 year old alter ego gives it no better than 3 stars, and that generous rating is due to the many bouncing boobies.

Up In the Air

2010-03-28T17:02:00.000-07:00

One of my friends has a man-crush on George Clooney. He doesn't really. But the story is funny. One time at lunch with our boss we were talking about some movie that starred Angelina Jolie. My friend mentioned that he understand what what all the hype was about her. Um, duh. She's hot! My boss then said, "What? Do you prefer George Clooney?" And so the joke started.

Up In the Air does star George Clooney. And, of course, I mentioned to my friend that I was going to watch the movie and I knew he would be jealous.

Clooney stars as Ryan Bingham, a consultant who is hired to go to companies and fire people. The job requires him to be on the road a lot, so he's 'up in the air', so to speak - a lot. His goal in life is to rack up 10,000,000 miles on his frequent flier card. As he is nearing his goal a new-hire at his company, where his boss is Craig Gregory (Jason Bateman), the new hire, Natalie Keener (Anna Kendrick) has a great idea: instead of flying to all of these companies to lay off people, they will do it via a new online video-conferencing program.

While on the road, Bingham picked up a love interest in Alex Goran (Vera Farmiga), also a consultant always on the road. And I'm not sure if it was a butt-double or if Vera really showed us that nice shot of her back-side, but I honestly don't care. I'll take it for what it is - a nice rump.

Meanwhile, Natalie has been assigned to work with Ryan and learn the business and determine how to train new consultants the techniques needed to be able to fire people online. However, she learns that the business is not as easy as creating a process and following it. There's more of an art to it.

Up in the Air, despite being a movie about firing people, is actually a very inspiring movie. It sets the tone for cutting the ties to something you don't like and being free to pursue your dreams, a theme that arises throughout the movie.

Rated R for booty and language, Up In the Air was directed by Jason Reitman, who also directed Juno and Thank You for Smoking. The movie is an hour and 49 minutes long. Also staring in the movie are Sam Elliott, Amy Morton, and Danny R. McBride.

Additionally, Up In the Air was nominated for several Academy Awards, including Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Supporting Actress, and Best Director, though it didn't win any of them.

I like Clooney myself, though I don't have a man-crush on him. And as I've mentioned before, I've seen a lot of Jason Bateman movies, and I don't think I have a man-crush on him either. But I can comfortably say that I like Vera Farminga. And her butt. Or whomever's butt that was.

I give Up In the Air 4 stars.

The Private Lives of Pippa Lee

2010-03-23T06:39:00.000-07:00

The Private Lives of Pippa Lee is a movie based on a novel of the same name by Rebecca Miller. In the movie, we go back and forth between the current and the past as Pippa struggles with life.

The older Pippa is played by Robin Wright Penn, who you may remember as Forrest Gump's girlfriend, who later went on to marry liberal extremist Hollywood lunatic Sean Penn. The younger Pippa is played by the lovely Blake Lively who was the blond in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.

The young Pippa grew up with a mother that was going through some serious problems, including being addicted to amphetamines. Her father, on the other hand, was a preacher who looked the other way, driving Pippa to run away from home and live with her lesbian aunt. She then falls into what every runaway experiences - lots of sex and drugs.

Pippa eventually hooks up with Herb (Alan Arkin), who decides to leave his wife for her, which should be a sign of things to come. Significantly older than Pippa, he begins to resent the way she treats him like he's an old man, despite the fact that he's an old man. She then begins to think about her life and her relationship with her mother and the relationship she now has with her own daughter and realizes that they are very similar.

Pippa soon runs into Chris (Keenu Reeves - who doesn't say 'dude' through the entire movie), a 35 year-old neighbor who's lost his way in life, but she quickly befriends him. However, things quickly unravel in her life, only to come back together in a quasi-acceptable manner.

It's difficult to say too much about this movie without giving it away. The characters are intriguing and kept my interest. In addition to those already mentioned, the movie also stars Julianne Moore as Kat, her aunt, Maria Bello as Suky, her sister (I think), Winona Ryder as Sandra Dulles, and Monica Bellucci as Gigi.

Directed and written by Rebecca Miller, Pippa Lee was produced by Brad Pitt, of all people. The movie is rated R for nudity, sexuality, language, drug use, and implied violence and is 97 minutes long.

I liked the movie, though it was somewhat depressing. But there's always something about an attractive crazy woman with a lost soul. It doesn't hurt that Robin Wright Penn, Blake Lively, Monica Bellucci, and Maria Bello are all very attractive. And Alan Arkin is one of my favorite old people actors. He's the perfect curmudgeon with the perfect voice.

For these reasons I will give Pippa Lee 3 3/4 stars. How's that for unconventional?

Extract

2010-03-15T06:47:00.001-07:00

Jason Bateman seems to be everywhere lately. We all remember him as the brother of Justine Bateman, the hot girl from Family Ties who disappeared from the face of the Earth. He made a name for himself on the show Valerie, which was then renamed Valerie's Family, then subsequently renamed The Hogan Family. But that's a different story.

Jason Bateman didn't really hit it big again until Arrested Development, one of the funniest shows ever and set the tone for his movie characters to follow. Since 2007 he has been in the following movies that I have seen:

The Kingdom

Juno

Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

Hancock

State of Play

The Invention of Lying

Up in the Air

Extract

Couple's Retreat

This time, he stars as Joel the owner and manager of a company that makes extract, you know - like vanilla-flavored extract used in baking. His company is doing really well, but his wife Suzie (Kristen Wiig) sucks and won't have sex, his employees are disgruntled and think they should be paid millions of dollars, and his best friend Dean (Ben Affleck) is a crazy bartender who's a little free willy with dolling out the drugs. Meanwhile, Joel is about as straight-laced as you can get.

There is hilarious interaction between him and his obnoxious neighbor Nathan (David Koechner) and the lawyer (Gene Simmons) who represents Step (Clifton Collins Jr) who is injured at work. And then there is the gigilo that he hires for his wife so that he can get a divorce.

Joel thinks he may have found something special when he runs into Cindy (Mila Kunis) who joins the company and takes an active interest in him. However, things start going amok at the factory and Joel is about ready to throw in the towel.

Having worked at a factory, I can totally relate to this movie. There is one line by one of the factory workers that I have heard no less than 3.721 million times - "Everyone knows that I'm the hardest working employee here!" I couldn't stop laughing. I even rewound the movie to hear that again.

Extract was directed by Mike Judge, creator of Beavis and Butthead and King of the Hill. The movie is 92 minutes long and is Rated R for language, sexual references, and drug use. Mila Kunis is totally hot, so look for her in some future movies.

The movie also stars J.K. Simmons, no relation to Gene Simmons, the lead singer of Kiss. You'll remember J.K. as J. Jonah Jameson, the chief of the Daily Bugle from the Spiderman Movies.

I really liked Extract for its quirky dry humor. Jason Bateman is becoming one of my favorite actors and this movie was perfect for him. I give Extract 4 stars.

Couples Retreat

2010-03-15T05:42:00.000-07:00

With their marriage on the line due to their fertility problems, Jason (Jason Bateman) and Ronnie (Malin Ackerman) decide that they might get divorced, but they decide to try to save their marriage at a couples' retreat, but need their friends to attend to get the discounted rate. With the promise to only go to the tropical paradise and to not have to participate in the marriage counseling, their friends half-heartedly agree to go.

Once on the island, not everyone gets what they bargained for. What was once considered a decent relationship, Dave (Vince Vaughn) and Cynthia (Kristen Bell) find themselves questioning their marriage. Meanwhile, Joey (Jon Favreau) and Lucy (Kristin Davis) sort of find out what they've always known - they don't care for each other too much. Finally, Shane (Faizon Love) is there with his girlfriend of 2 weeks - Trudy (Kali Hawk), because his wife left him and he wasn't going alone.

Directed by Messy Marvin (Peter Billingsley - best friend of Vince Vaughn), the movie also stars Carlos Ponce as Salvadore, the irresistible islander in a banana hammock, Peter Serafinowicz as Sctanley as the pompous director of the program, and Jean Reno as Marcel, the therapist.

Couples Retreat is about 90 minutes long and Rated PG-13 for some sexual innuendo and language.

There are definitely some funny parts, but there are way more awkward situations that just made me uncomfortable. This seems to be the new standard for Vince Vaughn movies (see Four Christmases). I had higher hopes for the movie, but it seems like the funniest parts of the movie were shown on the previews. I can give Couples Retreat 3 stars, but I'm leaning more toward 2 1/2.

The Accidental Husband

2010-03-09T05:42:00.000-08:00

Another romantic comedy from Netflix staring a woman that I totally cannot understand why men are attracted to her. I mean, Uma Thurman is okay, but I certainly wouldn't go out and buy a poster of her from Wal-Mart to tape onto the back of my door. And I like thin ladies, but seriously, what does Uma weigh, about 75 pounds?

The Accidental Husband stars Uma as Emma, a so-to-be bride who is a radio therapist who has convinced a young woman to leave her fiance', Patrick Sullivan (Jeffrey Dean Morgan), a NYC fireman, because she has determined that he's not right for her. Patrick hears the whole radio conversation and he vows revenge, so a neighbor kid hacks the city department of records and alters Emma's file to indicate that she's married to Patrick.

When Emma goes to get her marriage license with Richard (Colin Firth), she learns that she is already married. In order to get her license she must now get Patrick to sign annulment papers, which turns out to be more difficult than she realized (since Patrick is there to string her along). However, when she spends time with Patrick (as a result of his shenanigans) she sees his relaxed charm, learns a little about him, a little about herself, and wonders if she is making the right decision.

Directed by Griffin Dunn, The Accidental Husband also stars Sam Shepard as Emma's father, Lindsay Sloane, and Justina Machado as Patrick's ex-fiance'. Rated PG-13 because it's a romantic comedy, it contains some sexual content and some language.

Netflix only allows you to give whole star ratings. However, this is my blog and I'm am breaking with that. This movie was so predictable and awkward and I also thought it could have ended an hour earlier than it did, so 90 minutes was way too long. I can only give The Accidental Husband 2 1/2 stars.

17 Again

2010-03-05T12:01:00.001-08:00

If I'm not mistaken, this movie was released in August of 2009. I had it in my Netflix queue for a while, but as newer movies kept getting released and this movie seemed to be stuck with the "Super Long Wait" status, I decided to take it out and wait for the library to deliver it for me. I had put 17 Again in my library queue soon after it came out, but I was in like 85th position. It's still in my library queue and I think I'm 17th on the list now, but I happened to find a copy of it on the DVD shelf, so I grabbed it. I'm leaving it in my library queue because I want to see how long it takes to get it that way. Sort of an experiment.

17 Again stars former Friends star Matthew Perry as Mike O'Donnell, the dad who had a chance do make it big as a basketball player, but life chose a different path for him. Now 18 years later, his wife is divorsing him and he hates his job and he has fallen into total despair - until he meets that mysterious man that can change him back to a teenager again.

Nope - he doesn't change into Jennifer Garner (13 Going on 30) or Lindsay Lohan (Freaky Friday), but 22 year old teen sensation Zac Efron. And it's the same year. Now Mike needs to figure out the purpose of this transformation. And he determines that it's about him going back to high school to become a basketball star. However, when he returns, he learns things about his kids who are in high school and realizes that this journey isn't about him.

In addition to learning more about his own kids while pretending to be the son of Uncle Ned, he comes to see another side of his soon-to-be ex-wife Scarlett (Leslie Mann) and suddenly realizes that he still loves her. Can he somehow alter the future and save his kids and his marriage? Or is there another purpose to his mission?

A subplot of the movie is pretty darn funny, too. Mike ends up living with fantasy movie fanatic Ned Gold (Thomas Lennon), who gets a crush on high school Principal Jane Masterson (Melora Harden) after he enrolls Mike back in school. This plays out quite well.

The movie also stars the lovely Michelle Trachtenberg (Ice Princess), Sterling Knight, Jim Gaffigan, Margaret Cho, and the older brother of Bill Murray, Brian Doyle-Murray, most famous to me as the voice of The Flying Dutchman on Sponge Bob Square Pants.

Directed by Burr Steers, 17 Again is a buck-40 in length and is Rated PG-13 in order to get more money at the box office, but Netflix claims it was for language, some sexual material, and teen partying, all very minimal in my opinion.

I had low expectations of 17 Again, so when I found myself laughing through most of the movie and curious to see how it ended, I realized that it beat the odds and was a decent movie. Now, had I high expectations of the movie, I probably would have been disappointed. But since the movie delivered, I'll give it 4 stars.

Zombieland

2010-03-04T12:42:00.000-08:00

I watched this movie a week ago courtesy of Netflix. Actually, I paid for it, so it's not really a courtesy, is it?

Zombieland is a mild-humored horror about zombies. Some time in the future, a disease breaks out and Metallica plays great music and many people become zombies. Now living on his own in fear of zombies, Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) narrates the movie and gives us tips for living with zombies. Tips such as 'don't forget the double-pump'.

Suspicious of everyone, Columbus (who uses this name because that's where he's from) runs into Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson). Tallahassee has a fetish for Twinkees and a no-nonsense way of dealing with zombies - and this means fire power.

On their journey they run into 2 girls, Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) and Wichita (Emma Stone) who initially pretend to be sisters, but con the guys and steal their truck. After conning each other a couple of times, they eventually conclude that they need to work together and head to an amusement park where it is rumored there are no zombies.

Zombieland is gory-funny. It's not scary at all. Directed by Ruben Fleischer, Zombieland is 88 minutes long, which I thought was too short, and is Rated R for continuous violence, gore, and language.

I got a good laugh out of this movie. And with a cameo from Bill Murray, this movie my kind of horror movie. Nothing made me jump. And that's good. Additionally, there is awesome music throughout. And Emma Stone is pretty hot. For these reasons, I give Zombieland 4 stars.

The Invention of Lying

2010-03-03T19:03:00.000-08:00

The Invention of Lying was my latest Netflix movie. It stars Ricky Gervais, the quirky pudgy British actor, as Mark who is living in another dimension of our world where no one tells a lie. Everyone tells everyone the truth, not matter how much it hurts. People even volunteer information when it's not requested. This makes for some really funny scenes.

However, this all changes when Mark meets Anna McDoogles (Jennifer Garner). She tells him that she's not interested in him and she tells him exactly why. But suddenly he gets an idea to tell things that aren't true. Others cannot comprehend this new ability, but Mark decides to use it to his advantage.

Unfortunately, his ability to lie leaves him in a position where he uses untruths as a tool for compassion. His use of lies as a tool for compassion force him down a road that he was not ready to take, and now he must decide what is right and what is wrong.

The Invention of Lying also stars pretty boy Rob Lowe as Anna McDoogles' convenient love interest, Tina Fey as Shelley, Mark's assistant, in addition to cameos by Jason Bateman, Jonah Hill, Christopher Guest, and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Directed by Ricky Gervais and Matthew Robinson, The Invention of Lying is 99 minutes long and rated PG-13 for language, sexual situations, and a drug reference.

I thought the movie was fairly funny. The strength of the movie is that everyone tells the absolute truth and Mark can lie absolutely - and it's funny. However, near the end of the movie they get into an uncomfortable area where they start making fun of religion. That's not exactly where I want to see my comedy. For this I can only give The Invention of Lying 3 stars.

Whiteout

2010-03-02T16:42:00.000-08:00

Whiteout - a movie I picked up at the library. I like Kate Beckinsale. She's cute. You can't deny that. So whenever she's in a movie, I try to make sure I see it.

Whiteout stars Beckinsale as Carrie Stetko, a U.S. Marshal stationed at a research base in Antarctica. She is nearing the end of her stay as winter closes in, but someone turns up dead. It's up to her to investigate the crime. Her friend Dr. John Fury (Tom Skerritt) tells her to send the body home and worry about it later. However, there are only 3 days left until Antarctica's 6 months of darkness begins and everyone wants to leave, but the killer is amongst them. If she cannot solve the case, she may get stuck there for those 6 months.

While investigating the crime with the help of pilot Delfy (Columbus Short), she stumbles upon U.N. operative Robert Pryce (Gabriel Macht) who's doing his own investigation. Having a dark past, she now trusts no one and wonders what his real motive is.

Tension heats up when the masked killer shows up attacking and slashing people with an ice ax. However, while Carrie is investigating, she turns up more murders and more clues. It reads like a classic Scooby-Doo movie.

The cover of the DVD indicates that it's a murder mystery and the murder occurs fairly early in the movie, so the whole time my natural inclination is to figure our who did it. And this one is not that difficult to figure out. And one thing that I don't like is an easy mystery.

Directed by Dominic Sena, Whiteout is 96 minutes long and Rated R for violence, some mushed up dead people, language, and a frosted glass view of Kate naked, but too frosted to get excited about it.

I was not too impressed with Whiteout. It's not terrible, but it's way too predictable and convenient. And when people get injured, you can't expect them to get back up again and start running. It's just not realistic. And so for the fakeness, I can give Whiteout no better than 2 stars.

L.A. Confidential

2010-03-01T07:00:00.000-08:00

On the list of movies I need to get around to seeing, I finally got around to seeing L.A. Confidential. Based on the book of the same name by James Elloy, L.A. Confidential is set in, surprisingly enough, Los Angeles.

Set in the 1950's, Los Angeles is competing with Chicago and Washington, D.C. to be the most crooked city in America. Not only is their a lot of organized crime, but organized crime within the police department. But then Guy Pearce (Edmund Exley) is promoted to Detective Lt. He has it set in his mind that he's going to do his job the right way and without corrupting influences, much to the chagrin of Captain Dudley Smith (James Cromwell).

When a disgraced former cop ends up dead, Exley wants to solve the case, but is butting heads with Detect Sgt. Jack Vincennes (Kevin Spacey) and Officer But White (Russell Crowe). But in this case of cops versus cops, Exley's investigation is turning up more than he bargained for. And he better be careful, because people close to the case start ending up dead.

L.A. Confidential has an all-star cast. In addition to those previously mentioned, Danny DeVito stars as Sid Hudgens, the magazine insider who works with the police for inside tips on hot stories, Kim Basinger, as Lynn Bracken, the love interest of many a man, and David Strathairn as Pierce Patchett, the local pimp lord.

Directed by Curtis Hanson, L.A. Confidential is Rated R for violence, language, violence, sexuality, and violence. The movie is about 2 1/2 hours long, so if you've never seen it make sure you block out a good chunk of time to watch it because you'll be glued to the screen.

I LOVED this movie and would easily watch it again. I'm actually disappointed that I never saw this movie earlier than I did. The movie was nominated for 9 Academy awards, including Best Picture. Kim Basinger won for Best Actress in a Supporting Role, and Curtis Hanson and Brian Helgeland won for Best Adapted Screenplay. Additional nominations were Best Original Dramatic Score, Best Director, Best Art Director, Best Cinematography, and Best Film Editing.

For the above reasons, I give L.A. Confidential the sparsely distributed 5 Stars.

Super Fuzz

2010-02-28T06:36:00.000-08:00

I saw this movie for the first time sometime in the early 1980's on HBO when I was a kid. I recall thinking it was funny and that the music was awesome. When we joined Netflix a few years ago I looked up this movie and it was not available. However, Netflix allowed you to add it to your queue and when it became available it would be listed as one of the available movies.

A few weeks ago I noticed that the move was moved from the "Saved" DVD queue up to my active DVD queue. And last week it was released to the public. However, I didn't get it until Friday. And I watched it....on Friday.

Super Fuzz is about a rookie cop named Dave Speed (Terence Hill - the famous Italian actor) who is sent by Sgt. Willy Dunlop (Ernest Borgnine) to an offshore island (as a prank) to serve a parking ticket warrant. What neither of them knew was that a nuclear bomb was going to be tested over the island. Dave Speed survives the explosion and suddenly finds that he has super powers. However, his super powers seem to come and go and he doesn't know why.

Officer Speed returns to duty and drives his Sergeant crazy with his new powers, which the sarg doesn't believe. Meanwhile, Sarg has a giant crush on Rosy Labouche (Joanne Dru) and learns that she is coming to town. What he doesn't know is that she is tied to the local mob. When Rosy learns how to disable Officer Speed's powers, she frames him for the murder of Sarg. Can justice be served before Officer Speed is put to the electric chair?

Originally released in Italy and named Poliziottot Superpiu in 1980, Super Fuzz was directed by Italian director Sergio Corbucci who directed many unfamous Italian movies. Rated PG for some minor violence, a little cussing, and an almost topless dancer, Super Fuzz is 97 minutes long and also stars Marc Lawrence and Julie Gordon as Speed's girlfriend.

The movie is super cornie. The special effects are very funny, even by 1980 standards. The music is groovy. I've never heard a single song played in one movie as much as "Super Super" was played throughout Super Fuzz. However, it's quintessential 80's. If you like all things 80's you will love this movie. And for this I give Super Fuzz 5 stars. Even my kids thought it was funny. And that makes it a winner!

Everybody's Fine

2010-02-24T12:38:00.000-08:00

Recently released to DVD and sent to me by Netflix, Everybody's Fine is Robert De Niro's latest movie.

De Niro plays Frank, a recent widower, who plans a big family weekend at his house. Unfortunately, his four kids are spread out all over the country and he hasn't seen them since his wife died 8 months ago. After all of them cancel their visit, he decides to visit them individually. After dropping in unexpectedly at his first son David's he finds that he is not there, so he head's off to his daughter Amy's house, then the other kids. But each child has an excuse as to why they can't spend time with him.

At each house he finds that things aren't quite what he expected. He is slowly learning things about his children that he didn't know. His high expectations of them were shielded by his wife, but without her the truth starts to be revealed, and all is not rosy. Many scenes are accompanied with flashbacks to his children as he remembers them when they were younger. Pay attention to the details of this movie because many of them come back to you at the end.

Robert De Niro is great in this movie. If you are in your late 20's, 30's, or even early 40's - this is your dad. His little idiosyncrasies and total lack of acceptance of today will totally remind you of your father. I think this is one of his finest performances in a while.

Judging the movie by the cover you would think it was a comedy. After all they are all smiling, right? While there are funny parts to the movie, this is no comedy. This is a gut-wrenching tear-jerker. At the end of the movie my wife said it sucked. Then this morning she commented that she can't stop thinking about it. This made me think that it wasn't the movie that sucked, it was the sad situations that she didn't like. The movie definitely has a lasting impression.

In addition to De Niro, Drew Barrymore, Sam Rockwell, and Kate Beckinsale star as his children. Directed by Kirk Jones (who also did Nanny McPhee and Waking Ned Devine), Everybody's Fine is 99 minutes long and Rated PG-13 for "thematic elements" and some brief language, but also many scenes that will bring you to tears unless you absolutely have no heart.

Though not what I expected, the movie definitely had a solid impact and was sad and depressing. For bringing out these emotions, I think this movie deserves 4 stars.

Fired Up!

2010-02-19T04:44:00.000-08:00

I picked this movie up at the library because of the cute girl on the front cover and the tag line: "2 Guys. 300 Girls. You do the math." That can't be too bad, can it?

In the movie Shawn (Nicholas D'Agosto) and Nick (Eric Christian Olsen) learn that their tournament football game will not be in Daytona, Florida this year, but rather in Texas. They decide that rather than playing that game, they'd join the cheerleader squad with the opportunity to hook up with girls. This is not that far-fetched an idea. I had 2 roommates that did the same thing.

The fast-talking Shawn makes waves with the girls, but finds himself attracted to Diora (Molly Sims), the wife of the nerdy camp coordinator. Nick, on the other hand, instead of chasing girls falls for Carly (Sarah Roemer), the chear captain and the girlfriend of douche bag Dr. Rick (David Walton), who's not really a doctor. Additionally, while initially attending the camp to hook up with girls, they find that they actually enjoy cheering and are pretty darn good at it.

The movie runs in the same vein as American Pie. Some of the dialog is hysterical. The girls are all hot. And like any good comedy, the good guys win in the end.

I wouldn't be surprised if this movie went straight to video. I don't recall it in the theaters. If it was in the theaters it was probably there for 3 days.

Directed by Will Gluck, Fired Up! is 89 minutes long. The version that I watched said it was unrated and a synopsis of it on Wikipedia says that the unrated version has nudity and language, but I can tell you what I watched had no nudity and limited potty-language. So I'm not sure what I watched. If I had to guess, the version I watched would have been rated PG-13 for sexual innuendo, some minor language, and some minor violence.

Fired Up! was a good cheap laugh. There was several memorable lines which I've gladly been using on my friends. For this, I give Fired Up! 3 stars.

Fame

2010-02-18T05:08:00.000-08:00

This is the original Fame. I remember the television show as a kid and who doesn't remember the song? "Fame! I gonna live forever!" Every fancy kid on the block was singing that one. However, I had never seen the movie. When I heard that the movie was being remade I figured it was as good a time as ever to watch.

Fame The Original Movie is about a school for the performing arts in New York City. The movie starts with a bunch of 20 year olds doing rehearsals trying to gain entrance into each of the school's programs, such as acting, ballet, and orchestra (I guess). As you would expect from a school of artsy people, there is a lot of drama on and off of the stage.

There are several running plots in the movie. Two of the main characters are Doris (Maureen Teegy) and Ralph Garcie (Barry Miller). Doris is the shy daughter of an over-bearing mother and this is her opportunity to break free in life. Ralph Garcie is the talented actor and dancer with an attitude. Another character, Paul McCrane, plays Montgomery, the white-afro-haired kid who we all assume is gay (a gay guy in a performing arts movie? Shocking!) He later stared in ER and 24, 2 of the best 2-character shows on TV. Finally, we have the rich white girl who gets pregnant from a black guy. This is like one step further than Guess Who's Coming To Dinner.

As the 20 year olds are guided through each of their years in school (and don't age), they learn from themselves and each other to be the best they can be. Yeah, sounds like an advertisement for a bad movie on the Hallmark Channel.

Besides the expected drama, I was a bit shocked at the amount of nudity in the movie. I'm not complaining. Just shocked. Aren't these supposed to be high school kids? And there was a lot of cussing. Do artsy people cuss that much? The movie is a bit dated, but was still an overly average movie.

Directed by Alan Parker, produced by Alan Marshall, and staring Alan Vetter, Fame is Rated R for nudity, language, and I guess in 1980 dealing with the issue of homosexuality, which in 2010 we really don't bat an eye at. Fame is 134 minutes of drama, singing, and fine 80's pop-dance music.

As I said, an average movie. It was interesting to see New York in 1980. The dancing clothes were historically hysterical. And some of the acting was quite comical. And there is a cameo by the 26 year old Richard Belzer who later gained fame (no pun intended) in Homicide and Law and Order. Average is as average is. 3 stars for Fame, the original movie.

My One and Only

2010-02-17T04:55:00.000-08:00

Based on the true story of actor George Hamilton's childhood, My One and Only follows George's life across the country with his brother and mother after she leaves George's father.

Renee Zellweger is George's mom in this movie set in the late 1950's and rather than finding a job she finds it much classier to just find a nice man to marry. Several marriages and several different cities later they find themselves in California trying to make their life work. Meanwhile, George's father, played by Kevin Bacon, travels the country as the band leader for a big lounge band and occasionally runs into George (played by Logan Lerman).

Starting in New York City,the family trio go from Boston, to Pittsburgh, to St. Louis, and finally to Los Angeles. The movie is fairly funny with George's brother Robbie (Mark Rendall) stealing the show with his flamboyant quips. However, like many people in life, they are always running and never finding happiness. George wants to be a writer and Robbie wants to be an actor, while their mother wants to be married. Life may not turn out like they expect.

Also staring in the movie are David Koechner, Troy Quinn, and newcomer Molly C. Quinn.

My One and Only is Rated PG-13 for some sexuality, which was brief, but funny, and some language.

Directed by Richard Loncraine, who also did Firewall, this movie is an hour and 45 minutes long.

I thought this movie was decent. It kept me chuckling throughout and I enjoyed the subtle humor. I give My One and Only 4 stars.

Blame It On Rio

2010-02-13T19:22:00.000-08:00

I don't normally blog about older movies, but now and then one catches my attention for more than the movie. Blame It On Rio is one of those movies.

When this movie came out I was 11 years old. I remember seeing those sexy trailers on television and couldn't wait until the movie would be shown on Caltech Television (predecessor to Comcast) so that I could sneak downstairs in the middle of the night and watch it. Now that I'm 37, the only sneaking that I need to do is to do so so that my children don't see the movie.

Blame It On Rio stars movie friends Michael Caine as Matthew Collins and Joseph Bologna as Victor Lyons, Valerie Harper as Michael Caines' wife Karen, and Michelle Johnson as Jennifer Lyons and Demi Moore as Nikki Hollis, the daughters.

The plot of the movie is that Matthew and is wife are going through some difficult times and she decides to vacation elsewhere, leaving Matthew, Victor, and the girls to vacation in Rio de Janeiro without her. While on the vacation, Victor's daughter Jennifer shares her feelings with Matthew, who is 28 years older than her. He fights her off, but after she prances around naked for a while, he gives in and they make love - several times. Her friend and his daughter Nikki find out about it and now Matthew struggles with trying to end the relationship and whether or not he should tell his best friend Victor.

The movie is filled with the 80's, from Michael Jackson songs to big poofy hair styles. What intrigued me as an 11 year old still intrigued me as a 37 year old - lots of boobies. However, when reading about the movie I found out that the full frontal nude scene that Michelle Johnson did was recorded when she was only 17 years old. Scandalous.

Released in 1984, Blame It On Rio is rated R for some language, some minor violence, lots of breasts, and 2 seconds of underage nudity. The movie is an hour and 50 minutes long.

As with most movies that show a lot of skin, the plot is thin, and it rhymes. Despite the 11 year old in me, I give this movie 3 stars. The 11 year old rates it much higher.

Star Trek

2010-02-02T06:48:00.001-08:00

This movie is a little late, but I finally got around to seeing it. As is the trend with most movies now, you show several iterations of it, then you go back and recreate how they got there. Remember the Star Wars double-trilogy, X-Men, to name a couple.

In this release of another Star Trek movie, we are taken back to when James T. Kirk (Chris Pine) is born, a brief glimpse of his youth, and his unflattering attendance at Star Fleet Academy. Meanwhile, they also parallel Spock's youth and his rise to an officer in the Star Fleet (Spock (Zachary Quinto) is a bit older than Kirk).

The plot is confangled and a bit difficult to summarize, but basically the Romulans have attacked the Vulcans and there's a time warp and some treachery going on. After the captain of the Enterprise is taken hostage, it's up to Kirk, Spock, Dr. McCoy, Uhura, Scotty, Sulu, and Chekov to save the Enterprise and Earth from Nero, the evil Romulan. The movie is full of action, pretty decent computer graphics, and sound effects.

The movie earned nominations for awards including a Grammy for Best Score Soundtrack Album, and several People's Choice nominations: Breakout Actress, Breakout Actor, Favorite Franchise, Favorite Movie, though the movie walked away from each empty-handed.

Directed and produced by J.J. Adams, Star Trek is PG-13 for science fiction violence and some minor sexual content. And when you get to that part, the color on your screen is correct. She's green.

Also staring in the movie are Eric Bana (Captain Nero), Leonard Nimoy as old Spock, Simon Pegg as Scotty, John Cho as Sulu (from Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle), Karl Urban as Dr. McCoy, Zoe Saldana as Nyota Uhura, Anton Yelchin as Chekov, and Winona Ryder as Spock's mother.

I really really enjoyed watching this movie and look forward to the sequel. I freely give this new Star Trek movie 5 stars. I will definitely watch it again.

Whip It!

2010-02-02T06:04:00.000-08:00

When I saw that a movie titled Whip It! was coming out I figured it was a movie about the 1980's band Devo who was known as one of the one-hit wonders known for their song Whip It!. However, this movie had nothing to do with Devo. Nor did anyone in the movie have a red plastic flower pot on their head.

Whip It! stars Ellen Page, the young girl who seems to be type-cast as the disenfranchised teenager of her generation, though she's actually 23 years old. You'll remember her as the pregnant girl from Juno, the one that you wondered why in the hell she had sex with Michael Cera. But I digress.

In Whip It! (let me add that typing the name of this movie is driving me crazy because it ends in a punctuation mark and the auto correct wants to capitalize the next letter), Bliss is a young high schooler whose mother (Marcia Gay Harden) is living vicariously through her and pushing her to be in beauty contests, which Bliss could not care less about. Bliss finds a flyer about joining a roller derby in nearby Austin, Texas. She sneaks out of town and joins the roller derby despite being too young. And to her surprise, she's really good. What happens when her disingenuous commitment to beauty pageantry and her secret life as a roller derby collide?

Whip It! Is directed by Drew Barrymore, who also stars in the movie, along with Kristen Wiig, Juliette Lewis (sorry, that woman is getting nasty looking!), and Jimmy Fallon. Lower on the billing is Daniel Stern who plays Bliss' father. You'll remember him as the narrator of The Wonder Years.

Whip It! is 2 hours long and is rated PG-13 for some mild sexual content, crude dialog, language, drug use, and some violence (it is a roller-derby!).

I really enjoyed the movie, though I thought the middle was a bit long. It could have been a better movie if it was about 20 minutes shorter. However, the movie made me laugh and that's important. I liked it enough to give it 4 stars.

Julie & Julia

2010-01-27T08:40:00.000-08:00

As stated at the beginning of the movie, Julie and Julia is about 2 true stories, put together in parallel.

Julie Powell, played by Amy Adams, is a customer service representative in post-9-11 New York City at the Lower Manhattan Development Corporation who answers calls about victims and complaints about the new proposed tower.

Julia Child really needs no introduction. But if you lived under a Chia Pet your whole life, then Julia Child, played by Meryl Streep, is a famous chef that was on public television and taught the world to cook French foods with her unique voice and accident-prone style mannerisms.

In the movie, Julie needs some direction in life as she hates her job and her so-called friends, so her husband convinces her to do something, like blog about something she enjoys, like cooking. Julie then goes on to cook every recipe in Julia Child's cookbook in 1 year and blog about all of them.

Meanwhile, we follow Child's life in France with her husband who works for the American government. She went to a famous French cooking school, then began teaching cooking classes, and then collaborated with friends to write their own cookbook.

Meryl Streep was phenomenal in this role. Of all of the movies that I've seen her in, this is easily the best. She characterization of Julie Child was dead-on. The adorable Amy Adams, on the other hand, plays a bit of a whiny obsessed girl who can get a little bit annoying at times, but I always try to remember she's playing a character.

At one point in the movie Julie mentioned that they could make a book or a movie about her experiences. I immediately thought that would be a great idea, then I realized that I was watching that movie. Duh.

Streep was nominated for many Best Actress Awards, winning a Golden Globe for her performance, and the movie received a nomination from the Golden Globes for Best Picture.

Directed by Nora Ephron, no relation to teen idol Zac Efron, the movie also stars Stanley Tucci as Child's husband, and Chris Messina as Julie's husband. Julie and Julia is 2 hours long and is rated PG-13 for some potty language and some minor sexual imagery, though I think they threw that in there just to get the PG-13 rating. Otherwise, the movie was harmless.

I really enjoyed this movie and thought most of it was hysterical. Streep had me laughing all the time. And Amy Adams is always nice to look at. My only criticism is a couple of jabs at Republicans. One was deserved as it dealt with Joe McCarthy, who was a paranoid idiot. The other was totally unnecessary and even illogical. You'll see what I mean. Despite this, I give Julie and Julia 4 stars.

District 9

2010-01-25T06:44:00.000-08:00

I finally got around to watching District 9. The previews present the movie as a suspenseful science fiction movie of intellectual proportions. But they didn't show the bugs.

The first 10 minutes of the movie had me glued. It was really well done and, indeed, was very suspenseful. It was basically a series of interviews about the events looking in hind site.

Then they showed the bugs and then the Wikus Van de Merwe character (Sharlto Copley). Is it just me, or did he seem like one of Eric Idle's characters from Monty Python? I could totally picture him pitching commercials or being the tourist in European Vacation. And this made me laugh.

And then the people starting communicating with the "Prawns", who did not speak English, but rather a guttural squeaking. Fortunately, everyone understood each other. And I laughed some more. Is this a comedy? And then the Nigerians moved in. Hysterical. And I'm pretty sure this was not the intent.

On a serious note, I did find a parallel between the treatment of the Prawns and the treatment of illegal immigrants, which our government prefers to call undocumented workers (what if they're not working???).

Nevertheless, the movie is about how the South African government has decided to move in to District 9 where the Prawns are living and move them to an alternate location in an effort to rid the area of crime and alleviate the health concerns. However, during the search, seizure, and removal, Wikus is infected by some liquid and slowly becomes one of the Prawns. Now the government wants him, too, but for experimental purposes.

Now Wikus must fight for his life and has a different perspective on the life and adversities of a life as a Prawn.

Directed by Joe Carnahan (Smokin' Aces and the upcoming A-Team movie), District 9 is 112 minutes long and is rated R for bloody violence, language, and bugs.

Also starring in the movie are Jason Cope, Nathalie Boltt, and Sylvaine Strike, all actors I've never heard of.

I got a good laugh at the expense of this Sci-Fi movie, but the storyline isn't too bad. If you have time, you may get a kick out of it on multiple fronts. I give District 9 3 stars.

In The Loop

2010-01-19T17:44:00.000-08:00

I love politics. I love humor. Combining them would be like should be like the olfactory orgasm that a dog gets when he hangs his head out of the window as you're passing a garbage dump. But, sadly, this was not the case.

In the Loop is a dark comedy about the interactions of different people as the United States and the United Kingdom are preparing for war against a Middle Eastern country. The movie isn't about the President / Prime Minister, per se (though I hate that saying), it is about the people that make it happen. It's the ministers, the operatives, the generals, the secretaries, etc...

Staring in the movie are James Gandolfini as Lt. General George Miller, the arrogant career military guy that isn't taking any crap from any civilian policy wonk, and Peter Capaldi as the perpetually cursing arrogant Scottish civilian policy wonk who wants to rip everyone's head off and poop in their neck.

I never really got into the plot of this movie and soon lost interest. It may have had something to do with the constant cursing and threats upon everyone. I just didn't find the abusive behavior funny.

Directed by Armando Iannucci, In the Loop is not rated because of excessive smack talk and cursing. The movie is 106 minutes long.

Not the worst movie I've ever seen, but I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. I give this one the dreaded 2 stars. Avoid at nearly all costs.

The Hurt Locker

2010-01-14T03:30:00.000-08:00

Another in a series of movies about war in Iraq, The Hurt Locker follows Bravo company, a group assigned to disarm IED's (Improved Explosive Devises).

The plot is not very complex and there really isn't much of a story-line in the movie. It's more on the lines of a documentary which is being reenacted. I couldn't find information stating if it was based on a compilation of true stories, but I suspect that it was. The storyline was written by Mark Boal who was embedded with a bomb squad in Iraq.

The movie follows several long sequences of events when IED's are discovered and must be disarmed. There is a lot of tension throughout the movie as Iraqi spectators gather and watch the bombs being disarmed. No one knows if any of the spectators have remotes to explode the devise or if they will come under fire during their mission.

I anxiously watched the movie from the edge of my seat wondering if the next bomb would detonate while it was being disarmed. Tension remained high throughout the entire movie. Additionally, there is a sequence where the company inadvertently rendezvous with a British outfit, one character which is played by Ralph Fiennes, and they suddenly are engaged in a firefight with insurgents from a distant home on the hillside.

The movie is a bit long - about 2 hours and 10 minutes, but I had no trouble sitting through the entire thing. The Hurt Locker is directed by Kathryn Bigelow (ex-wife of Cameron Bigelow, director of Titanic and Avatar), and she hasn't directed a big movie since K-19: The Widowmaker starring Harrison Ford in 2002.

The Hurt Locker also stars Jeremy Renner as William James (the disarmer), Anthony Mackie as JT Sanborn, the leader of the group, Brian Geraghty as Owen Eldridge, the somewhat incompetant rookie, and Christian Camargo as John Cambridge, the social worker who is concerned about your feelings.

Filmed in Jordan and Kuwait, The Hurt Locker is Rated R for war violence and language. Reading about production of the movie, it was excruciatingly hot during filming and they were shot at several times while filming only 3 miles from the Iraq border.

As you can tell, I really enjoyed this movie. I didn't leave hollering "Get 'er done, America!" like a Southern redneck. The movie really opens your eyes to the stress that our soldiers face every day in war and the movie does a great job of making you feel like you are in the middle of it.

I give The Hurt Locker the coveted 5 stars.

Adam

2010-01-12T05:55:00.000-08:00

Not much for romantic dramas, I decided to give this one a try as it came at romance from a different angle. An attractive young lady named Beth (Rose Byrne) who always wears skirts moves into an apartment building and is intrigued by one of her cute neighbors Adam (Hugh Dancy). However, after some awkward interactions, Adam finally admits to her that he's not crazy or weird, but rather he suffers from Asperger's syndrome, a form of Autism.

Up to the challenge (only because she finds him cute), Beth does some research and decides to become romantically involved with Adam, though she quickly learns of the limitations of their relationship. Adam, meanwhile, continues to go through his own challenges in life, many of the things that we would take for granted.

Meanwhile, Beth's big-shot father (Peter Gallagher - remember him and his eyebrows in Summer Lovers with Daryl Hannah?) is up on corruption charges and may go to prison, adding to the stress of her life, a life in which Adam is unable to provide the needed attention and affection that Beth needs.

The movie did not end as I had expected, but it did end nicely. I think the movie does a good of shedding light on Asperger's.

Directed by Max Mayer and also staring Amy Irving, Adam is Rated PG-13 for thematic material, which I still don't understand, sexual content, and language. The movie is 99 minutes long.

Not a blockbuster, nor the best movie you'll ever see, it did earn the Alfred P. Sloan Prize at the Sundance Film Festival. I enjoyed the movie enough to give it 4 stars.

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

2009-12-30T13:36:00.001-08:00

Any boy who grew up in the 1980's looked forward to the release of this movie. Others who can't stand to go to the movie theater looked forward to its later release on DVD.

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra follows the evil scientist who creates the Cobra organization and his creation of Destro. In this presumably introduction to a series of movies, Cobra gets a hold of Nano weapons that destroy everything in their path the way you'd expect termites to destroy an old house - but really fast. Much of the action takes place in Paris and all of our favorite landmarks fall prey to this destructive weapon. It's up to the top secret Joe organization to seek out the members of Cobra and bring them down.

The movie has a star-studded cast including Dennis Quaid as General Hawk, Channing Tatum as Duke, Marlon Wayans (brother of the many other Wayans), Rachel Nichols (though without her traveling pants), Brendan Frasier, and Sienna Miller.

Now with such a heavy-weight cast, you would think that this would be one awesome movie. However, most of the movie focuses on computer-generated special effects that at times get a bit ridiculous. There's a ton of chase scenes and shooting scenes, though I probably should expect a lot of shooting scenes.

Directed by Stephen Sommers (which explains the appearance of Brendan Frasier - he's directed several of his movies) The Rise of Cobra is 2 hours long and is rated PG-13 for thousands of sequences of computer-animated violence, and as Netflix put it: strong sequences of violence and mayhem. I think that's about right.

I thought it quite humorous that the ladies in the movie were allowed to wear non-standard issue military suits that had zippers that only came up to their cleavage. And they also had on a good amount of makeup and long hair - characteristics of most of the women in our military.

I was not at all impressed with the movie and honestly do not look forward to the sequels. The plot was all over the place and it did not even resemble anything realistic. I was easily distracted during the movie by shiny things and was glad when it ended. I will have to say that I had a promotion code from Red Box allowing for a free rental, so I don't feel too bad. It didn't cost me anything. I give G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra 2 stars.

The Goods, Live Hard, Sell Hard

2009-12-28T17:51:00.000-08:00

When times get tough in this economy for a car dealership, they call on Don Ready (Jeremy Piven), who's a fast-talking closer who gets the job done. He brings his team of crack commandos with the intention of clearing the lot over the 4th of July weekend.

Ready has his plans in order and everything goes well until he is blindsided by love. Unfortunately, his love interest, Ivy Selleck (Jordana Spiro) is engaged to competing car dealer super dork Paxton Harding (Ed Helms) who is out to destroy the dealership, which is owned by patriarch Ben Selleck (James Brolin).

Don Ready's crew consists of Brent Gage (David Koenchner), Babs Merrick (Kathryn Hahn), and Jibby Newsome (Ving Rhames). Fortunately for Ready, he also has the spirit of McDermott to help guide him in his troubled times. McDermott is a former team member who died in a plane stunt. In the grain of Ron Burgandy, the movie has its totally goofy parts and potty humor.

Also staring in the movie is Alan Thicke as Paxton Harding's father, and Will Ferrell as McDermott. I think you'll get a good kick out of the two of them.

The Goods, Live Hard, Sell Hard is Rated R for sexual situations, language, violence, and nudity, though the nudity, be forwarned, consists of them watching porn on television. The movie is 90 minutes long.

Overall, I had several good laughs, but thought the plot a bit thin and drawn out. If Redbox doesn't have any new releases available, this one's not too bad. I give it 3 stars.

I Love You, Beth Cooper

2009-12-24T11:09:00.000-08:00

When the super-nerd valedictorian Dennis Cooverman (Paul Rust) speaks at a high school graduation he encourages everyone to say the things they've always wanted to say, and he leads by example by telling cheerleader and uber-popular blond Beth Cooper (Hayden Panettiere) that he loves her (hence, I Love You, Beth Cooper).

In addition to telling Beth that he loved her, he also said that some should admit they are dumb, that they have eating disorders, and that they are gay. No one is identified by name, but everyone seems to know who he is talking about.

Dennis' post-graduation life takes a huge turn when Beth Cooper accepts his invitation and shows up at his house for his graduation party with 2 of her popular friends. Unfortunately for Dennis and his friend (or perhaps fortunately), Beth's ultra-lunatic military boyfriend decides to hunt him down after his little graduation stunt and teach him a lesson. The 5 then jump in the car for an adventure of their life.

Here's the quiz - this movie is a romantic comedy. One character is a super nerd and never gets the girl. The girl, on the other hand, is very popular, but is now confronted with spending a lot of time with the guy that has loved her since seventh grade. What happens in the end?

Being a quasi-nerd myself (shut-up!) I can totally relate to Dennis, though I hope that I am a lot better looking. Wasn't there that girl in school that you so admired but didn't have the balls to talk to? Oh, yeah. That was me.

I Love You, Beth Cooper was directed by Chris Columbus (not the 15th century explorer, but rather the director of several Harry Potter movies in addition to Adventures in Babysitting and Mrs. Doubtfire). The movie is 102 minutes long, slightly longer than the standard 90 minutes for a romantic comedy. It is rated PG-13 for violence, continuous sexual references, drinking, drugs, and a split-second view of Beth's left breast as seen from behind, though no nipple.

Also staring in the movie is Alan Ruck, better known as Cameron Frye in the Ferris Bueller's Day Off movie, Jack Carpenter, Lauren London, Lauren Storm, and Shaun Roberts.

I Love You, Beth Cooper is a decent laugh. I was able to watch the entire movie without distraction or losing interest, so that helps the rating. The plot was a bit thin, but then again it's a teenage romantic comedy. We can't confuse those teenagers with complicated plot-twists and existentialism.

I give this movie 3 stars.

Taking Woodstock

2009-12-21T06:24:00.000-08:00

When a young and up-and-coming man in a local no-name town convinces the town council to have a bigger summer concert, he suddenly becomes overwhelmed by the response. A son of Jewish immigrants who operate a run-down motel just outside of town, Elliot Tiber (Demetri Martin), serves on the town council and with a little left-hand behind the back transaction uses the permit to schedule some of the biggest names in music.

After making arrangements with local dairy farm operator Max Yasgur (played by American Pie father Eugene Levy), the organize the festival to use his farm and plans start rolling fast. Jake spends the next couple of weeks getting the hotel and field ready, but as the day approaches, the town soon becomes overwhelmed by hippies and the locals are not happy. Originally scheduled to be a concert requiring tickets, common-sense led them to change it to a free concert. There was no way they were going to be able to control the mass of people that showed up. The festival finally arrives and Jake experiences life at Woodstock and learns more than he ever learned at college.

Also staring in this movie are Imelda Staunton as Jake's mother, Henry Goodman as Jake's father, Live Schreiber as a transvestite (yes, you read that correctly), Dan Fogler as a head of a local theater troupe, and Emile Hirsch as Jake's friend who recently returned from Vietnam.

I'm no historian on the Woodstock event, but this is totally how I pictured events as they played out. Thousands of hippies. Dozens of naked people. Acid. Camping. Rock music. And more naked people.

Directed by Ang Lee (Brokeback Mountain), Taking Woodstock is Rated R for nudity, drugs, and yet more nudity. And the movie comes in right at 2 hours.

I liked Taking Woodstock for the seemingly obvious reasons. Not only is it funny (Jake's mother is hysterical), but there's also that good quirky small-town dialog. Not an Academy-Award winning nominee, but not too bad. I give Taking Woodstock 3 stars.

Some interesting facts - the concert was actually in the town of Bethel, New York, about 43 miles from the actual town of Woodstock, NY. Performers at the festival included Ravi Shankar, Arlo Guthrie, Joan Baez, John Sebastian (Welcome Back Kotter), Canned Heat (Goin' to the Country), Mountain, Grateful Dead. Creedance Clearwater Revival, Janis Joplin, Sly and the Family Stone, The Who, Jefferson Airplane, Joe Cocker, Ten Years After, The Band, Blood Sweat & Tears, Crosby Stills Nash and Young, Sha-Na-Na, and Jimi Hendrix. Can you imagine that concert today? It wouldn't happen. Too many stuck-up greedy bands. This was quintessential 1960's.

Bonnie & Clyde

2009-12-19T11:50:00.000-08:00

I saw this movie for the first time a few weeks ago and it quickly rose to the top of my list of favorite movies. Made in 1967, this classic film stars a young Warren Beatty, possibly before his horse Naturally won, in addition to a very attractive 26 year old Faye Dunaway, Gene Hackman, Gene Wilder in his first movie, and Denver Pyle as Sheriff Frank Hamer. You'll remember Denver as Uncle Jessie from the Dukes of Hazzard.

You probably know of the story of Bonnie and Clyde. It's a true story. You can read about it on Wikipedia. If you're so dumb that you don't know, it's about an outlaw named Clyde who likes to rob people, he befriends a young damsel named Bonnie and they storm across the South raising hell. In the end - they die. Sorry to give away the ending. But come on. If you didn't know that then you need to go back to middle school.

I loved Bonnie and Clyde. The action was hot, the dialog was great, and the acting was superb. Knowing the ending I was getting anxious as the movie rolled along wondering if it was getting ready to happen.

Directed by Arthur Penn, this hour and 50 minutes movie is Rated R for violence and some sexuality, but no nudity. Additionally, the movie received 2 Academy Awards - Estelle Parsons received a Best Supporting Actress Award and Burnette Guffrey received Best Cinematography and Bonnie and Clyde was selected for preservation by the United States National Film Registry.

Without a doubt, Bonnie and Clyde is a 5 star movie!

Inglorious Basterds

2009-12-18T17:11:00.000-08:00

I add movies to my movie queue through several methods. My friend Kim is also a member of Netflix, so when I see that she adds a movie, I'll check it out. She likes the artsy stuff, so I have to be careful. Another obvious method is when I see a trailer on TV that is interesting, I'll add it to my Netflix queue. Finally, I'll click on my favorite actors and actresses on IMDB or Netflix and add their new movies.

I'm not sure what I was thinking when I added Inglorious Basterds to my queue. I'm not implying early in the review that it was a bad movie. On the contrary. I thought it was a comedy. That it was not.

Inglorious Basterds stars Brad Pitt, Christopher Waltz, BJ Novak (of The Office), and a bunch of other foreign actors. Mélanie Laurent, a 26 year old French actress, plays the Jewish theater owner. She's easy on the eyes. And speaking of eyes, as is appropriate for her role, her eyes gave off a sense of deep pain. Also in the eye-candy department is Diane Kruger, a German actress.

Three minutes into the movie and I was quite certain that this was no comedy. All the people being shot with a machine gun gave that away. The movie flows like any good historical movie. Until the part where the David Bowie song starts playing. And the hand-written name tags pop on the screen.

The premise of the movie is focused around a German SS officer (Christopher Waltz) who hunts down Jews. One of the Jews in his early hunts escapes and makes her way to Paris where she takes over her deceased aunt and uncle's theater. One day she meets a soldier who turns out to be sort of a war phenom who was cast as himself in a propaganda movie. He tries to proposition her, she is then forced to host a showing of his movie, which gives her an idea.

Meanwhile, Brad Pitt is the horribly quaint Lt. Aldo Raine from Tennessee. I sound more like Carly Shay than Brad Pitt sounds like a southerner. Though I think that is by design. Lt. Raine is leading a crack commando group through France to raise hell. And hell they raise.

The movie is a bit gory and includes all of the expected violence and profanity that you would expect from a Quentin Tarantino movie. Inglorious Basterds is rated R for said violence and profanity, in addition to some sexuality and an incorrectly spelled word in the title.

I found myself drawn to this movie despite its length (2 1/2 hours) and was anxious nearly the entire time. Oh, my gosh! What's going to happen now? Additionally, if Christopher Waltz does not win an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor, the Hollywood needs to be burnt to the ground. Then again, that might not be a bad idea anyway.

Nonetheless, I think this was a great movie and freely and under no duress give this movie 4 stars.

Four Christmases

2009-12-15T05:03:00.000-08:00

This movie is over a year old, but like any good Christmas movie it is released in the theater one year and onto DVD the following year. And best of all, Four Christmases stars Reese Witherspoon, but not her fork, and Vince Vaughn.

Like a lot of couples in America, Brad and Kate are delaying marriage (if getting married at all) and choosing to live in sin instead. And like many American families, both parents are divorced. Rather than having Christmas with their multiple families, Brad and Kate have ventured off to foreign lands each year instead. However, this Christmas, circumstances have changed and they are forced to spend their Christmas with each of their parents - thus they will be having four Christmases. Get it?

Of course, each of their families is crazy, each being situated on the opposite sides of a four-pointed spectrum (if there is such a thing). However, while spending time with each of their families brings out uncomfortable comedy, it also reveals facts that Brad and Kate didn't know about each other, which may threaten their relationship.

Four Christmases also stars a well-known supporting case, including Robert Duvall, Sissy Spacek, Jon Voight, Mary Steenburgen, Dwight Yoakam, in addition to Jon Favreau as Denver and Tim McGraw as Dallas.

The movie is rated PG-13 because it's a romantic comedy and PG-13 is the required rating for generating box office receipts. Additionally, the movie has adult language (though commonly used by Baltimore city children), violence, and sexual humor. Furthermore, the movie is 88 minutes long.

Four Christmases was directed by Seth Gordon, also known for the hysterical comedy King of Kong and the funny TV show Parks and Recreation.

I was a bit disappointed with Four Christmases. I did find it comical that the 9 foot Vince was paired up with the 5 foot Reese. However, as far as the plot was concerned I was actually starting to feel bad for the families. The comedy was a bit over the top and a bit more slap-stick than what I like. Therefore, unfortunately, I am forced to give this Reese Witherspoon movie only 2 stars.

Paper Heart

2009-12-10T06:42:00.000-08:00

I tend to not like artsy movies (read: I lose interest several minutes into the film). However, many Indie (independent) movies are very entertaining. Napoleon Dynamite being the most notable. How can I separate independent movies from artsy movies? My dilemma.

Paper Hearts, as I soon learned, is an artsy movie. And it was no Napoleon Dynamite. The movie stars Charlyne Yi in her quest to make a documentary about finding love. She's a skeptic of love having never been in love.

Along comes Michael Cera, who plays young awkward actor named Michael Cera. The two strike up conversation at a party and soon develop a quasi-friendship/relationship. I think Yi tries to avoid the relationship because she's annoying and she doesn't want to put Michael through the pain of dating someone who's timidly obnoxious.

Hark. They develop that relationship anyway. The movie is shot as a movie about making a documentary, so it seems difficult to distinguish between what is real and what is acting. Of course it's all acting, but it's supposed to be real. Confused?

Paper Hearts also stars Seth Rogen, Dimitri Martin (never heard of him), Paul Rust (who's also in Inglorious Basterds and I Love You, Beth Cooper, two movies I hope to see soon), and Martin Starr.

Directed by Nicholas Jasenovec, Paper Hearts is 88 minutes LONG and is rated PG-13 for language, though I didn't notice - probably because I wasn't paying attention to the movie after I lost interest about 35 seconds into it.

Labeled as a Romantic Comedy and a Romance movie, I found little comedy in it. I guess it was romantic because it's about two young people being awkward trying to hook up. If you have a choice between doing laundry and watching this movie, make sure you don't mix the colors with the whites. You want to avoid color bleeding as much as possible. And don't forget to use fabric softener.

I give this movie an inglorious 2 stars. Not for me. However, I'm probably not a big fan of movies that win the prestigous Grand Jury Prize awarded at the Sundance Film Festival.

Funny People

2009-12-04T06:42:00.000-08:00

Sometimes you can't tell whether a movie was intended to be a comedy or a drama. Or maybe it's just a funny drama. Is that possible? I think Funny People falls into that undefined category.

Funny People stars Adam Sandler and Seth Rogan, in addition to a plethora of cameos of real stars. You'll see what I mean. In a plot that seems to cross from fiction over into reality, Sandler is a successful comedian named George Simmons who still does some stand-up, but has recently learned that he has a form of cancer and is beyond the point where normal medicines can work, so he begins an experimental treatment. Of course this leads him to become depressed and unable to write comedy for himself.

This is when he discovers struggling stand-up comedian Ira Wright whom he finds very funny. He makes Ira an offer than he can't refuse and Ira begins to write jokes for him. As the two spend time together, Ira learns what a jerk Simmons is, but how hollow and empty his life is.

Simmons begins to go through the phases of grief (anger, anger, depression) and finds himself reflecting upon his life and making amends, including with ex-girlfriend Laura (Leslie Mann).

As Ira and George spend time together, they build that special bond, but will George's arrogance get the best of them?

Directed by Judd Apatow (Knocked Up, 40 Year Old Virgin), Funny People also stars Australian actor Eric Bana, Jonah Hill and Jason Schwartzman, in addition to cameos by James Taylor, Andy Dick, Charles Fleischer, Paul Reiser, Geroge Wallace, Dave Attell, Norm MacDonald, Sarah Silverman, Eminiem, and Ray Romano.

Funny People is Rated R, though I watched the unrated version. The movie has a lot of adult language, violence, strong sexual situations, and some nudity. The movie is an hour and 45 minutes long.

I enjoyed this movie. I laughed a lot, though the serious parts were very sad and humbling. I give this movie 4 stars.

Night at the Museum 2 - Battle of the Smithsonian

2009-12-02T13:00:00.000-08:00

My kids totally enjoyed Night at the Museum. Totally. So, of course, they would totally love Night at the Musuem 2 - Battle of the Smithsonian.

For this installment of the movie, we have Ben Stiller returning as Larry, along with Owen Wilson, Robin Williams, Hank Azaria, Steve Coogan, and new to the series, Amy Adams. Isn't she cute?

In this sequel, Larry has started a new company focusing on his desire to invent and it has become incredibly successful. Larry in now independently wealthy and no longer has to get by as a night watchman at the museum.

However, upon a trip back to the museum he finds that all of this statue friends are crated up in boxes and heading out. They are slated for storage in the Smithsonian Institution's archives - presumably to be lost forever. Larry has decided he must do something about it!

Also in the shipment to Washington, D.C. is the magical tablet that brings everyone to life. And guess what? Everything comes to life! And this includes Amelia Erhardt. Hubba-Hubba!

By the way, I did a Google search on Amelia. Amy Adams makes a much more attractive Amelia Erhardt than Amelia Erhardt. And have I mentioned that Amy Adams is cute? You'll really like her skin-tight flying pants. I did.

Anyway, Larry finds himself in a predicament as one of the statues that came to life knows about the tablet and its powers and is bent on getting a hold of it and using its powers to control the world. Fortunately, he has the backing of all of his New York museum friends and some new ones, like the very attractive Amy Adams as Amelia Erhardt, in addition to George Custer and Abraham Lincoln.

Night at the Museum 2 is rated PG because Amy Adams' pants are so tight. However, my kids laughed hysterically throughout the movie and their laughter was highly contagious.

The movie is an hour and 40 minutes long and was directed by Shawn Levy, who directed the first Night at the Museum, in addition to the remake of Cheaper by the Dozen.

From an adult perspective, I give this movie a solid 3 stars. However, my kids give it 4 1/2 stars. And that's what is important. In addition to Amy Adams being cute.

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

2009-11-27T10:34:00.000-08:00

I watched this movie back-to-back with The Proposal, so it's sort of like a visual romantic comedy orgy.

Ghosts of Girlfriends past stars Matthew McConaughey's handsome face and quick and funny one-liners, but not his acting ability, in addition to Jennifer Garner, and Michael Douglas.

McConaughey plays Conner Mead, the orphaned nephew of Douglas (Uncle Wayne) who grows up having to raise his little brother Paul (Breckin Meyer). While growing up, Conner has a budding relationship with Jenny Perotti (Garner). However, after spending some time with Uncle Wayne, Conner learns that you need to treat girls like dirt and rack up as many as you can. This will make you happy. Or so he thought.

Conner Mead returns home for his brother's wedding and is reunited with Jenny. The old flame heats up, but Conner plays it cool and smooth. Unfortuantely, Conner being Conner, starts ruining the rehearsal evening and possibly threating the wedding. That night, however, like the Christmas Carol, Conner is visited by the ghosts of girlfriends past, the ghost of girlfriends present, and the ghost of the future. Scaring the crap out of him, he vows to make up for his wrongs.

This romantic comedy, also predictable, has some funny twists that made me laugh, but for the most part is just McConaughey running around trying to be cool, but also acting like a fool. Meanwhile, Jennifer Garner is still a bit of a pretensious woman who wants to find the best in people. I still find her attractive, but not as much as in previous movies.

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past was directed by Mark Waters who also directed The Spiderwick Chronicles and Just Like Heaven (a Reese Witherspoon movie!). The movie is an hour and 40 minutes long, another requirement of romantic comedies. It is rated PG-13 for sexual content, language, and some drug content, all requirements. So it appears that this movie has met the recipe requirements for a romantic comedy, so it passes.

I thought this movie was just average. Nothing thrilling, nothing too funny, no man-women interactions that gave me that tingle. So I'm just gonig to have to give this movie the standard 3 stars.

The Proposal

2009-11-27T10:07:00.000-08:00

The Proposal is a fairly new release to DVD with a handful of well-known actors, including Ryan Reynolds, who starred in several movies in the past 2 years (including X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Paper Man, Adventureland, and Definitely, Maybe), Sanda Bullock, Betty White, Mary Steenburgen, and Craig T. Nelson, better known as Coach.

Reynolds plays Andrew Paxton, an aspiring writer who works for dragon lady bitch Margaret Tate (Bullock) at a prestigious editing firm. Upon learning that her Canadian visa is expiring and she's threatened with deportation, she informs her company that Andrew and she are getting married, much to Andrew's chagrin. Fearing losing his position and being black-listed in the industry if he fails to comply with her demands, he succumbs to her threat. Unfortunately, the INS (Immigration and Naturalization Service) is on to her and they are out to prove that the wedding is a fraud.

In an effort to learn more about each other and pad their story, they head to Alaska for Andrew's grandmother's (White) 90th birthday. However, as Bullock, who grew up without a family, learns more about Andrew and his wonderful family, she starts reflecting upon herself and perhaps sees that some change is in order.

As with any romantic comedy, predictability is key. So if 2 people are forced to fake a marriage in order for one of them to stay in the country, what do you suspect will happen to the real relationship between them? Of course!

The Proposal was directed by Anne Fletcher who also directed 27 Dresses. The movie is an hour and 40 minutes long and is rated PG-13 for sexual content, language, and nudity, which is really just Sandra Bullock running around with one hand over her genitals and another across her breasts. So even though she's technically naked, you ain't gonna see anything. But I'm sure that you're not going to complain either.

I have always been a fan of Bullock and I think she looks pretty darn good for 45 years old. And Ryan Reynolds seems like a pretty cool dude. No, it's not a man crush. This comedy will make you laugh and is generally an enjoyable movie. I'll give it 4 stars.

Brüno

2009-11-24T06:49:00.000-08:00

This movie sucks. Don't watch it.

Oh, did you want more of a review? Okay.

Having watched Borat, which I thought was absolutely hysterical, I knew I had to watch Bruno. I thought I knew what the premise was - a homosexual fashion reporter coming to America to try and make a name for himself. He would use his overzealous homosexuality in awkward situations with people that you would expect not to be tolerant of homosexuals. Fair enough. I know what I'm getting. Sacha Baron Cohen is still funny. I can get past the other, right? Not quite.

Bruno is a homo-erotic sexcapade whose only objective is in-your-face homosexuality with intentions of crossing the barriers of decency to the point that people (the ones watching the movie) are uncomfortable. Sure, there were a couple of funny parts. But watching him do the windmill with his penis, simulated oral sex, and ram-rodding, are just not funny. And when it seems to be persistant and pervasive, it is just irritating.

A friend forwarded a review to me written by a gay person that said that even open-minded people would react uncomfortably and that the movie in general is just in bad taste. Another friend said that she was sorry she hadn't given me that feedback either. She saw it earlier and said it was totally not worth watching.

So, for what it's worth, Bruno is rated R (though that was generous) for pervasive and crude homosexual content, graphic penises, and language. Bruno is 82 minutes too long, and has cameos by Ron Paul, Paula Abdul, Elton John, Bono, Harrison Ford, and Richard Bey.

Some reviews have stated that this movie is not appropriate for kids. I say if you let your children watch this movie then Child Protective Services should storm your house and take immediate custody of your children and have you arrested.

My rating system is 1 through 5, so I cannot legitimately give it zero stars, so Bruno earns the dubious 1 star award.

Netflix Delay

2009-11-17T09:32:00.000-08:00

Another delay. I dropped My Life In Ruins in the mailbox yesterday, but Netflix has no idea where it is today. Perhaps I should find another mailbox.

Taking of Pelham 123

2009-11-12T04:42:00.000-08:00

This is a remake of the 1974 film that had a decent cast including Walter Matthau, Robert Shaw, Dick O'Neill, and future Seinfeld show husband and wife Jerry Stiller and Doris Roberts.

The modern version of the movie, that includes a lot more cussing, includes Denzel Washington, John Travolta, Luis Guzmán, John Tuturro, and James Gandolfini, who goes from the head of the mob in The Sopranos to the mayor of the city.

In the 35 years that have passed since the original, the plot has changed very little. A New York subway train is hijacked (the Pelham 123) and stopped in a tunnel. Through some mechanical wizardry, they are able to take over the communications and begin making their demands to dispatch.

Recently demoted to train dispatcher because of a bribery investigation, Zachary Garber (Denzel) initially makes contact with criminal mastermind Ryder (Travolta). Despite the disparity of their roles in the current situation, they form a bond because they know what it's like when the man comes down on them.

This exciting thriller is full of action and hostile dialog, which means a lot of cussing, much like you would expect from a movie with hostages and a crazed man with guns. The Taking of Pelham 123 was directed by Tony Scott, a well known director who has other thrillers on his resume such as Spy Game, Enemy of the State, Crimson Tide (another Denzel movie), and Top Gun.

The movie is an hour and 40 minutes long and is rated R for non-stop F bombs and violence, which includes shooting and intense car accidents.

I enjoyed watching this movie and having seen the original version recently, enjoyed looking for the parallels between the two movies. There are some differences, but I think Tony Scott did a good job of not deviating too much from the original to make this an entirely different movie.

I give The Taking of Pelham 123 1-2-3-4 stars.

The Answer Man

2009-11-11T05:01:00.000-08:00

An independent film (Indie Film) originally known as Arlen Faber, The Answer Man stars Jeff Daniels as, hark, Arlen Faber, an author of spiritually-related inspirational books.

Arlen is an intelligent man who has answers to a lot of simple questions. Logic is his ally, though he plays it off as inspiration from God. A pathological jerk, Faber tries to hide from society as he suffers from his own psychoses. However, circumstances, such as a bad back, force him to interact with society and that is when he runs into a single mother (Lauren Graham - Flash of Genius, Because I Said So, & Evan Almighty) who really doesn't give a crap about who he is and he finds that moderately intriguing.

Also staring in the movie is Kris (Lou Taylor Pucci) who is a recovering alcoholic who lives with an alcoholic. Kris owns a bookstore that buys back books and Faber likes to return all of his books for money. Unfortunately for Kris, times are tough and Faber is the thorn in his side at the worst possible time.

Now that Faber is falling in love, he starts to loosen up a bit and without this veil of ambivalence towards society, starts to show some compassion.

This romantic drama is rated R for language and is 97 minutes long. Directed by John Hindman, the movie also stars a couple of really cute girls whom I would not mind seeing again - Olivia Thirlby and Kat Dennings.

I liked this movie a lot and give it 4 stars. I got several good laughs from it. And if you are a weeper, this movie will probably move you to tears.

After having reviewed the movie, I checked Jeff Daniels' movies and realized that I have rated his movies at least 4 stars 6 times. That's pretty darn good.

How Green Was My Valley

2009-11-05T12:10:00.000-08:00

One of things that I am trying to do with my movie watching is pick off the winners of the Best Picture. How Green Was My Valley was the winner in 1941. The movie is based on the book by Richard Llewellyn about life in the mining towns in Wales during the late 1800's or early 1900's from the perspective of young Huw Morgan, though now told through his eyes as an older man.

The movie stars Walter Pidgeon (who has a magnificant voice) as Mr. Gruffydd, a very beautiful Maureen O'Hara as Angharad Morgan, Huw's sister, and Roddy McDowall as Huw Morgan. Roddy is probably better known as one of the apes from Planet of the Apes during its heyday in the 1960's.

Life in the mining town was peaceful, but soon turned sour when talks of unionization started and rumors of communist ties began to be associated with different residents. Huw, appearing to have a higher intelligence than most of his townsfolk, is sent off to another town to attend school, but soon learns of the prejudices and stereostypes that afflict his town. He quickly learns to fight to protect himself and his valley's honor.

Meanwhile, rumors spread of an unholy relationship between Mr. Gruffydd, the new preacher in town, and Angharad. Though not true, the rumors destroy the reputation of the good preacher and he ends up leaving the Church and Angharad's reputation is likewise soiled.

Throughout the movie tragedies strike, mostly at the mine and the Morgan's begin to lose the members of their family and Huw has little interest in staying in the Valley. Eventually, everything good that once represented the town has disintegrated. What was once a green valley is now one covered in the gray and black slag of the mine, and the happy smiling faces of the singing townsfolk are now the quiet saddened & ruined faces of a people whose spirits have been destroyed.

How Green Was My Valley won numerous awards including Best Picture for Producer Darryl F. Zanuck, Best Director for John Ford, Best Supporting Actor for Donald Crisp for his role as Gwilym Morgan, the patriarch of the family, Best Black-and-White Cinematography, and Best Black-and-White Art Direction-Interior Decoration.

The Award for Best Director was significant for John Ford as it was the third year in a row that he had won the award, the others being Stagecoach in 1939, and The Grapes of Wrath in 1940.

The movie is just under 2 hours long and was produced prior to movie ratings, though there is nothing that would garner it anything other than a G-rating except that it wouldn't draw an audience unless it had a PG rating.

I read the book several years ago and admit that it is one of my favorite books. Given that, I criticize the movie for what it is missing, though if it did icnlude everything in the book the movie would be about 6 hours long. I therefore give How Green Was My Valley a hesitant 3 stars.

Whatever Works

2009-11-04T06:35:00.000-08:00

I've never been much of a fan of Larry David. Sure, the stuff he wrote for Seinfeld was hysterical. But Seinfeld played the part. When Larry David does the same thing, he's just annoying, gassy, egotistical, arrogant, and whiny. Have you ever seen Curb Your Enthusiasm? Do you really think that's funny?

Whatever Works is David's newest creation. He's not one for movies, but he jumped that barrier, probably in an unapologetic attempt to get some more money. Heck, be basically said so in the movie. He's pretending to talk to the audience in the beginning and he narrates the picture throughout.

David plays Boris Yellnikoff who does a lot of yelling. He eats at the deli everyday and chats with his friends. He doesn't appear to have a job - other than complaining about everything. One night a young vagrant named Melodie St. Ann Celestine (Evan Rachel Wood - The Wrestler) pleads for some food as she hasn't eaten all day. Being young and somewhat attractive, Boris takes her in for just a few minutes so that she can get something to eat. She ends up staying for months.

Boris slowly becomes more attracted to this Southern belle from a strongly religious Christian family. Since Boris is a self-proclaimed genius, he is able to show her the way by complaining about everything and pointing out everything that is wrong - mostly with religion.

Eventually Melodie's mother comes looking for her, but fortunately Boris is there to corrupt her and separate her from her false religious beliefs and into turning into a hedonist. Melodie's mother, on the other hand, has different plans for her.

All plans come to fruition when Melodie's father (Ed Begley Jr.) shows up. In the name of humor, all religious beliefs are bastardized and everyone is happy.

The movie was written and directed by Woody Allen. I found many of the scenes to be funny and even laughed at loud at a couple, something that doesn't happen too often. However, I was a bit dismayed at the constant bashing of religion. Yes, I get that it was the point of the movie. I think Rachel Evan Wood is cute and is a likable character and easy on the eyes, but the fake Southern accent sort of wore on me.

Whatever Works is rated PG-13 for language, extensive complaining by an overly sensitive non-practicing Jew, sexual situations, and a room full of pictures of a naked woman. The movie is just under 90 minutes long, which legally is about as much Larry David as the Federal Trade Commission allows in one sitting.

Also staring in the movie were Patricia Clarkson as Melodie's mother, Christian Johnston, Jessica Hecht, Adam Brooks, Lyle Kanouse, and Michael McKean.

If you are a religious person, I would recommend avoiding this movie. If you don't mind a few low blows at your beliefs and can appreciate the movie for its pathetic humor (this isn't a bash at the movie. Boris is intentionally a pathetic character.), then you may enjoy this movie. I'll give Whatever Works the low-end of the 3 stars.

Netflix Delay

2009-11-03T07:55:00.001-08:00

Netflix did not receive the movie I put in the mail yesterday. Is election day not a postal delivery day? Or am I just getting my monthly stiff since I got several new releases in a row?

Clash of the Titans

2009-11-03T04:51:00.001-08:00

Having learned that there is a remake underway of Clash of the Titans, I thought it would be a good time to watch the original. I recall this movie from my childhood. During one week in 1981 my brother and sister spent the week at my grandparents' house. I could not go as I had baseball games. However, since my mom worked at night, on the nights that I didn't have a game my dad took me to the movies. We saw The Empire Strikes Back, The Great Muppet Caper, and Clash of the Titans. It was great bonding with my dad at the movies during that week.

The original Clash of the Titans stars Harry Hamlin as Perseus, son of Zeus. Hamlin went onto greater fame with L.A. Law. Also starring were Sir Lawrence Olivier as Zeus, Judi Bowker as Andromeda, Burgess Meredith as Ammon the playwrite, Claire Bloom as Hera, and Ursula Andress (of James Bond fame) as Aphrodite.

Perseus, heir to the kingdom of Argos, is moved by the goddess Thetis during a dream to Joppa where he is to marry Andromeda, but only after he can answer a riddle. If he fails, he will be burned at the stake.

Unfortunately for Joppa, Queen Cassiepeia's transgression of comparing her daughter's beauty to be superior to that of Thetis while in the temple dedicated to Thetis causes the status to come to life and declare that her daughter must be sacrificed to the Kraken, one of the titans. Andromeda must be unknown to a man (i.e. a virgin). If the sacrifice is not carried out, then the Kraken will destroy Joppa. It is now Persues' job to save Joppa.

Perseus' journey takes him to the far reaches of land, first to a visit to the Stygian witches, then across the River Styx to the isle of the dead to face Medusa, and several battles with Calibos, the son of Thetis and former fiancé of Andromeda. Calibos was transformed into a monster for his transgressions against Zeus, including the murder of the herd of flying horses except for Pegasus. To help him along his journey the gods give Perseus several gifts, including the helmet that makes him invisible, the sword that can cut stone, a talking shield that gives advice, sort of like a talking 8 ball, and Bubo, the magical owl.

This 1981 mythology classic is very dated by today's standards. It features double-screening and stop-motion special effects. However, when I was 9 years old, it was quite scary. The movie is rated PG for violence and nudity. And by nudity there was more than I remembered as a child, probably because naked women are less alluring to a 9 year old than a 37 year old. Had this movie been made today it would most likely be rated PG-13.

Clash of the Titans gets a boost because of my fondness for the movie as a child. It also gets a boost from the naked butts of Judi Bowker, and Vida Taylor. I sentimentally give Clash of the Titans 4 stars. Remember to put the remake in your Netflix queue. It stars Liam Neeson, Sam Worthington, Ralph Fiennes, and Alexa Davalos. It looks quite good.

Chéri

2009-11-02T18:35:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure if this movie is a fantasy for young men or older women. All I know is that while I was watching the movie I kept thinking that my friend Twinkie would L.O.V.E. this movie. This morning I sent her an email asking if she had seen the movie, she had not, but she replied that she just watched the trailer and she totally agrees that she would love this movie.

Chéri stars Michelle Pfeiffer, the still-attractive 51 year old starlet of Scarface, Grease 2, Dangerous Minds, and Batman Returns fame. Set in the 1920's in France, no longer the 1950's of Los Angeles, and no longer the young Stephanie Zinone of the Pink Ladies, she is now Lea de Lonval, the madame of gentlemen.

Across town, Madame Peloux, played by Kathy Bates, is the mother of Chéri (Rupert Friend), a dandy of a young man with absolutely no ambition in life. Madame Pelous wants de Lonval to take him under her wings, per se, to help him to....become a man, per se.

The arrangement is to last for several weeks, after which time Chéri would be ready to find his bride. However, Chéri ends up spending many years, not weeks, with de Lonval to the point that they are like husband and wife. When time comes for Chéri to leave, de Lonval realizes that she is no longer his teacher, but finds herself in love with him.

Also staring in the movie is Felicity Jones as Edmee, Chéri's bride-to-be, who is quite easy on the eyes.

The movie has a lot of almost nudity, a little real nudity (Chéri), a lot of sex, though never more than a butt, thus giving the movie its R Rating.

Directed by Stephen Frears who is known for The Queen, High Fidelity, and Dangerous liaisons, Chéri is 93 minutes long.

Chéri is just an average movie for me. Though I found the ending a bit humorous, I did think it was a quick out. However, if you are a chick and you like romantic dramas bordering on comedies, you surely would enjoy this movie. If you are into action heroes, explosions, and wild nudity, this ain't your movie. Chéri gets 3 stars from me.

Assassination of a High School President

2009-10-30T05:47:00.000-07:00

Assassination of a High School President is a dark comedy staring Reece Thompson as Bobby Funke, pronounced Funky by everyone but Bobby, as the somewhat awkward sophomore who is on the school newspaper and is trying to make a name for himself so that he can get nominated for a prestigous summer journalism program at Northwestern.

Reece learns of a potential conspiracy and gets some quick information and writes the crack story implicating the student body President, resulting in his removal from office. However, things don't turn out as they initially appear and eventually Funke uncovers an even bigger conspiracy and learns a huge lesson in investigative journalism.

His investigation leads him into a relationship with the sultry Francesca Fashini (Mischa Barton). She's the girl of most guys' dreams and he cannot believe that she falls for him. Or has she?

High school principal Kirkpatrick, played by Bruce Willis, is a Gulf War Veteran and runs the private Catholic school like a prison with little tolerance for mischief. By no means are Kirkpatrick and Funke on the same team.

Assassination of a High School President is definitely a teen angst movie that many teenagers will be able to relate, though the movie is rated R, technically making it so that most teenagers cannot watch it until they are out of high school.

The movie is rated R for drug and alcohol use (by minors), language, lots of sexuality, and some nudity, though not close enough to get you really excited, but I'm sure most guys are not going to complain.

The movie is 93 minutes long and was directed by PhD candidate Brett Simon who gets his first big break in films.

Assassination of a High School President certainly has an entertainment value and I found myself relating to Funke (though I'm not sure if that is a good thing). Mischa Barton kept me glued to the screen. I remember her as the shy roommate in the sexually explicit Lost & Delirious movie depicting a graphic lesbian relationship between Piper Parabo and Jessica Pare'. Barton also stared in the moderately successful television series The O.C.

Given my tastes in movies, I give this movie the standard 3 stars. Not too much desire to watch it again, but it entertained me for the time.