Paul

The movie Paul is a culmination of science fiction, referencing popular movies, comics, books, nerd conventions, Area 51, and all other such nerdome, as experienced by British travelers Graeme Willy (Simon Pegg) and Clive Gollings (Nick Frost).

After attending the San Diego Comic Con, Graeme and Clive rent an RV (recreational vehicle for all you city-folk) and map out a course of extraterrestrial legends across the desert-Southwest of the United States that they plan to visit. As you would expect anywhere outside of New York City, Boston, and Los Angeles, America is inhabited by lunatic right-wing religious nuts carrying guns, wearing camouflage, and spitting on the floor. Clive and Graeme run into such characters and thus begin their flee from the law.

However, in this dramatic flight, they nearly literally run into Paul, an alien (Seth Rogen), with quite an attitute (like Seth Rogen) and a propensity for some of the finer vices of society, (like Seth Rogen).

What they didn't know is that Paul is also being pursued by Special Agent Lorenzo Zoil (Jason Bateman), Agent Haggard (Bill Hader), and Agent O'Reilly (Joe Lo Trulgio) under the direction of "The Big Guy" (Sigourney Weaver).

Along the way, the Brits run into one-eyed redneck Jesus girl named Ruth (Kristen Wiig) and her father Moses Buggs (John Carroll Lynch), of which Graeme strikes up a love interest (with Ruth, not her father).

All tensions culminate at the end with some good ole' fashion violence. The movie is strung together with some hysterical reference to science fiction pop culture (such as Star Wars). Check out the music being played in the country bar! Or the Han Solo reference, which is more subtle.

There are cameo appearances by Jeffrey Tambor, Bateman's castmate on the hysterically funny show Arrested Development, and the occasionally funny David Koechner.

Paul is Rated R for language, violence, drug use, sexual reference, and at times an inappropriate attack on religion, though interestingly, none of the other reviews mentioned that. But then again the other reviews probably came from liberal atheists out of New York and Los Angeles. The movie is about an hour and 45 minutes long.

I thought Paul was very funny at times, but dragged along at others. I agree with some reviews that the movie had a lot of potential and left it on the drawing board. Paul could have been absolutely hysterical, but unfortunately achieves only moderately funny.

I'll beam down 3.4 stars.

The Eagle

The Eagle is a historical fiction about the disappearance of the 9th Legion of the Roman army. Historically true is that the legion advanced north of the Hadriatic wall in Britian, never to be seen again. The Eagle was an important symbol of the time and the legions would defend it to the end.

Despite his father being given up for dead, young Marcus Flavius Aquila (Channing Tatum) requests to post in Britian near where his father would have been. Young Aquila proves himself a valuable warrior and eventually requests a mission to cross the wall and recover The Eagle, despite not knowing its whereabouts. He has the support of his uncle (Donald Sutherland) and is given a slave a British slave named Esca (Jamie Bell) to accompany him.

They set out for the north of Britian, an area now known as the Scottish Highlands and run into a rabble of people, where they fight and show their gallantry in hope of finding The Eagle. Does it still exist? If they do find it, can they actually return it to Rome?

The Eagle is Rated PG-13 for violence and some borish British acting and is just under 2 hours long.

Also staring in the movie are Mark Strong, Tahar Rahim, and Denis O'Hare - all extremely famous actors from the Highlands.

I kept my expectations for this movie low as I've seen some of Channing's other movies (Public Enemies, G.I. Joe, and The Dilemna). However, I actually enjoyed this movie. The storyline was interesting and with it spurred my interest in reading about the actual 9th Legion, some part of history that I was unaware.

Despite the lack of credible actors, I can give The Eagle 3.8 stars.

Real Steel

My wife won tickets to the see this movie, but actually had no interest in seeing in, so she offered the tickets to me and I took my good friend Duckman and we hauled off to White Marsh to see it. We got there a few minutes before it started, but much to our chagrin the only seats left were the ones right at the front where you have to stare straight up to see it. Ugh...

In the future, society has shunned the brutality of humans boxing each other, and instead shifted to boxing robots. Charlie Kenton (Hugh Jackman) is one of the premier boxing robot operators in the world, but certainly not the best. He has a brief encounter with world fame, but quickly falters and begins to wonder if the end of this career path is nearing.

Charlie eventually encounters eleven year old Max (Dakota Goyo) who latches on to him and Charlie humors him by helping him rebuild a relic shadow boxer named Atom and agrees to take him to matches.

Max quickly learns that he does not pocess the skills to operate Atom, but Charlie does. Thus begins their adventure to climb to the top of the boxing world.

So how did I like this movie? This movie was about as predictable as the alphabet. Several times I whispered to my friend what was going to happen next, and low and behold, it happened. He then predicted another scene. One of my Facebook friends, without even seeing the movie, summarized it by saying it is Transformers meets Rocky. Let me tell you, that's not too far from the truth.

Also staring in the movie are Evangeline Lilly, best known for Lost, Kevin Durand, Hope Davis, and James Rebhorn, who you'll remember as the headmaster in Scent of a Woman, and other such movies.

Real Steel is 127 minutes long and Rated PG-13 for violence, language, intense action, and severe predictability.

The movie was moderately average, and have I mentioned predictable? I'll give this movie 2.5 stars. Not bad for a free movie.

Henry's Crime

If you've done the time, do the crime. That's the motto of Henry's Crime. Henry (Keanu Reeves) is convicted of assisting in a bank robbery and does several years in prison in beautifully scenic Buffalo, New York. He didn't do it, but wouldn't turn in his friends that did the crime. And his wife leaves him. Great.

While in prison Henry befriends Max Saltsman (James Caaaaan) and older prisoner that takes him under his wings. While doing his time, Henry and Max learn of each other's crimes. Max is comfortable is prison. It's his home. He's fed. He sleeps. They tell him what to do. It's easy. But Henry's ready to leave. But one thought sticks with him after he hears it while in line getting a haircut: "if you've done the time, do the crime".

After leaving prison, Henry runs into Julie Ivanova (Vera Fermiga), an actress in a play at a theater that sits next to the bank. Perhaps she's a asset to commit his crime, and perhaps they really fall in love. And perhaps this is a bogus adventure.

This movie moved really slow. Bill and Ted are convincingly not very intelligent. Shane Falco suffers from lack of compelling dialog. Why Julie would even let Neo into her life is beyond me. I like James Caaaaaaan. His character is believable and very interesting, as always. Farmiga is okay. I certainly wouldn't expect any Hollywood awards for this film.

Henry's Crime was directed by Malcolm Venville, who's also known for the compelling and heart warming movie 44 Inch Chest. Also starring in the movie are Judy Greer and his pretty, but shallow wife, Fisher Stevens as a former friend and criminal, Peter Stomare as the director, and Bill Duke as the security group.

Henry's Crime is rated R for language and some sexual situations. The language seemed to be randomly placed, giving the impression that it was added with the intention of grabbing that R rating. Remove a few F-bombs and two scenes of moving bed sheets and this movie is easily rated PG-13.

I found myself watching the timer on the DVD player hoping it would almost be over. As much as I have been hoping for 20 years that Keanu Reeve's movie career is on the cusp of turning around, this movie isn't it. I give Henry's Crime 2.4 stars.

Boogie Woogie

When I first saw that Heather Graham was in this movie, I thought to myself, 'this is the second movie she's starred in with the word "boogie" (Boogie Nights was the other). It has nothing to do with nasal drippings. It has to do with dancing and art.


Boogie Woogie is considered a cerebral drama, based in London. Heather Graham plays the role of Beth Freemantle, the assistant and rising star at an art gallery. She works for Art Spindle (Danny Huston), the arrogant and manipulative studio owner. But more importantly, Amanda Seyfried is in the movie starring as a hired assistant named Paige Oppenheimer. Also important to the movie is Alan Cumming as Dewey Dalamanatousis, the flamboyant artist who wants to get his art displayed.

The film tracks these different members of different classes of society. The money rules, and those struggling want some of that money.

The plot of this movie is fairly thin. However, the characters are awesome. Dewey is that weenie of a guy that you really can't stand, but yet harbour sympathy for the fight against the way he is treated. Danny Huston is at the top of his game. He is such an absolute ass and he has an intolerable, yet catching laugh. "ha-ha. HA_HA!!" I find myself repeating it often. It's so phony, but so awesome.

And of course we have both the lovely Amanda Seifried and Heather Graham. The movie also stars Gillian Anderson, Stellen Skarsgard, Jack Huston, and Charlotte Rampling, whom you may remember being totally nude in The Swimming Pool.

Boogie Woogie is Rated R for strong sexual content, graphic nudity (genitals), language, and drug use. Boogie Woogie is 94 minutes long. Fairly short for a non-romantic comedy.

By the way, Boogie Woogie is the name of the famous painting in the movie that they were pursuing. It was owned by Mr Alfred Rhinegold (Christopher Lee), an impoverished gentleman who is being pushed to sell the valuable painting.

Overall, the movie was okay. Like I said, the plot is thin, but the characters are excellent. I would watch this movie again, but need to give it some time. Ha-ha. HA-HA!!! I give it 3.3 stars.

Hall Pass

Hall Pass is a movie that most middle-aged men can relate to. And don't use prepositions to end sentences with.

Rick (Owen Wilson) and Fred (Jason Sudeikis) are two middle aged men who are unhappy with their sex lives. Their wives, Grace (Christina Applegate) and Maggie (Jenna Fischer) get tired of catching them looking at other women and surfing porn. They talk with their friend Dr. Lucy (Joy Behar, who I swear her real name is Joy Blowhard) and Dr. Lucy suggests giving their husbands hall passes. This is a pass to do whatever they want for one week and it will save their marriage. This pass includes flirting with women, kissing women, and having sex with other women. In this age of sexually transmitted diseases, this seems to be a big turnoff to me, but if you can be shallow and just look at the intent without the consequences, this could be interesting.

The wives skip town with their kids and the boys are left at home to do as they please. However, they soon realize that they are not 20 anymore. Picking up girls isn't that easy when you're in your 40's. The movie is pretty funny throughout much of the first half. Seeing the guys drinking at the bar that turns out to be Applebee's cracked me up!

The movie has a nice twist when the women put their guard down and start meeting men. At this point I figured out the rest of the movie.

Hall Pass is definitely funnier in the first half compared to the second half. It lacks direction past the first hour and seems to be mostly filler until they can come to a conclusion.

The movie has cameos by former Who's the Boss starlet Alyssa Milano and former Red Sox and Baltimore Orioles player Dwight Evans, in addition to comedian Bo Burnham, and J.B. Smoove.

Hall Pass is directed by the Farrelly brothers, Peter and Bobby. You'll recognize their other romantic comedies and regular comedies, such as Dumb and Dumber, Something About Mary, Me, Myself, and Irene, Shallow Hal, and Fever Pitch.

Hall Pass is Rated R and is 105 minutes long. For those of you who attended Baltimore City public schools this is an hour and 45 minutes. The R-Rating is for some language and nudity, but the straight guys will be disappointed as it was penises. For you gay guys, you'll be super excited!

I did get a few good laughs in this movie, so despite that they came in the first 55 minutes, I'll give Hall Pass 3 stars.

Kill the Irishman

Based on a really interesting true story, Kill the Irishman stars Ray Stevenson as Danny Greene, an Irishman who rises to power in the mafia in Cleveland. The movie opens being set in the 1960's on the Cleveland waterfront. Tired of being bullied and overworked, Danny takes the necessary steps to help his union. This eventually leads him to bigger and better things, until eventually he's basically running the Cleveland mafia

Danny Greene's fate is obvious, and it's his murder and investigation that helped the Justice Department bring down the notorious mobster families in New York. Those cases were tried by future New York City Mayor Rudy Guiliani.

In addition to Ray Stevenson, the movie stars Vincent D'Onofrio as Greene's closest ally. You'll remember D'Onofrio from his younger days when he played Private Pyle in Full Metal Jacket. Also starring in the moving is Christopher Walken as on of the mob connections in Cleveland who helps run money from New York, Val Kilmer as the Cleveland detective, Linda Cardellini as his first wife (remember her from Freaks and Geeks?), Tony Darrow, a real-life mobster who also starred in The Sopranos, Paul Sorvino, from Law and Order and he played a mobster in Goodfellas, and finally Laura Ramsey, the very attractive girlfriend of Danny Greene.

The movie was directed by Jonathan Hensleigh, but I read a review of the movie in the Cleveland Plain Dealer that humorously said 'had Danny Greene lived and operated in New York, he would have been a higher profile gangster and the movie would ultimately have been directed by Martin Scorsese and starred Robert de Niro.

Kill the Irishman is Rated R for strong violence (shootings and car bombs), language, and nudity (Laura Ramsey...gggrrrrr)

I really liked this movie. I'd have to say this is one of the better movies that I've seen this year. Had I realized that this movie was based on a true story prior to watching it, I probably would have enjoyed it even more. As it was, once the movie finished and those closing comments came on the screen, I thought, "Oh, crap! I didn't know that!"

Given what I know now and how much I liked this movie while watching it without the historical benefit, I give Kill the Irishman 4.5 stars.